The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSPopular Rajesh "Raj" Koothrappali Quotes
Raj: Do you think you'll go to hell for eating sweet and sour pork?
Wolowitz: Jews don't have Hell. We have acid reflux.
Leonard: You still have a cold?
Raj: Maybe, but I don't care. That's the good thing about NyQuil -- it's like, 10% booze. I call it the "nighttime sniffling, sneezing, coughing, so you can talk to girls medicine."
Go away! She wants New Delhi, not Kosher Deli!
I'm telling you, dude. The only way to feel better about Penny going out with other guys is for you to get back on the whores.
Howard wanted to write "mumbo jumbo," but I said no, our Sheldon would say "hokum."
Raj: You slipped and fell into a robot hand?
Wolowitz: Yes.
Raj: Penis first?
Wolowitz: Yes. Now help me!
Leonard: I'd suggest a lubricant, but I have a feeling you fell on some of that as well.
Leonard: Did you guys see the paper in the American Physics Journal on supersolids? It's pretty interesting. This guy's working from a hypothesis which ...
Raj: Spoiler alert! Spoiler alert!
Leonard: What?
Raj: Don't ruin it for me, man! I printed out a PDF to read on the potty.
Wolowitz: Why do you even want this here? Its size is completely disproportionate to its purpose!
Raj: Considering its purpose was to piss you off, I'd say it's spot on.
When I call him his phone plays Browned Eyed Girl. Which now what I think about it is not so good.
Leonard: How can you have a girlfriend you can't even speak to women?
Raj: Two words: deaf chick. It doesn't matter if i can't talk cause she can't hear me.
Leonard: What?
Raj: That's what she said.
Raj: Hands off my sister.
Sheldon: Why would I touch her? She's covered in airplane germs.
Sheldon [to Kripke]: Also, I am given to understand that your mother is overweight.
Raj: Oh, snap.
Sheldon: Now of course, if that is the result of a glandular condition and not sloth and gluttony then I withdraw that comment.
