Favorite Ross Geller Quotes
Ross: So I told Carl nobody, no matter how famous their parents are, nobody's allowed to climb on the dinosaur. Of course, this went right in...
Rachel: (Thinking) I love how he cares so much about stuff. If I squint I can pretend he's Alan Alda.
Monica: (Thinking) Oh good, another dinosaur story. When are those going to become extinct?
Chandler: (Thinking) If I was a superhero that could fly and be invisible, that would be the best.
Gunther: (Thinking about Ross) What does Rachel see in this guy? I love Rachel, I wish she was my wife.
Joey: (Singing "The Baby Elephant Walk" in his head) Da dadada da da da da da duh. Da dadada da da da da da duh.
Phoebe: (Thinking) Who's singing?
Ross: I don't want to be single. Okay? I just want to be married again.
(Rachel enters the coffee shop wearing in a wedding dress)
Chandler: And I just want a million dollars.
Chandler: I definitely stuck my tongue down her throat.
Monica: Yeah ... that was me.
Chandler: Sorry ... when I've been drinking too much, I can get a little over-friendly.
Monica: That's okay.
Rachel: That's okay.
Ross: (Pause) That's okay.
Ross: I'm gonna go visit Marcel at the zoo and surprise him.
Chandler: You know what? I think he will be surprised until he realizes he's a monkey and, you know, not capable of that emotion.
Rachel: This is about you stealing my wind!
Ross: Your wind?
Rachel: Yes, my wind. How do you expect me to grow if you won't let me blow?
Ross: You, you know I... I don't, have a, have a problem with that.
Rachel: Okay, I just, I just really need to be with myself right now. I'm sorry.
Phoebe: Uh uum, um, um.
Rachel: You're right, I don't have to apologize. Sorry. Damn it!
Ross: Just admit it Chandler, you have no backhand.
Chandler: Excuse me, little one, I have a very solid backhand.
Ross: Shielding your face and shrieking like a girl... is not a backhand.
Chandler: I was shrieking... like a Marine.
Phoebe: I remember when I first came to this city. I was fourteen. My mom had just killed herself and my step-dad was back in prison. And I got here, and I didn't know anybody. And I ended up living with this albino guy who was, like, cleaning windshields outside port authority, and then he killed himself, and then I found aromatherapy. (To Rachel) So believe me, I know exactly how you feel. (Pause)
Ross: (To Rachel) The word you're looking for is "anyway."
Monica: With that moustache doesn't Chandler remind you of Aunt Sylvia?
Ross: (Sounding relieved) Thank you!
Monica: Paul, this is everybody. Everybody, this is Paul.
Joey: Hey, Paul, the wine guy.
Ross: Hey, Paul.
Phoebe: Hey, Paul.
Rachel: Hi, Paul.
Chandler: I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name. Paul, was it?
Ross: I think I'm just gonna go home and think of my ex-wife and her lesbian lover.
Joey: Hell with the hockey! Let's all do that.
Ross: The doctor got the 'K' out. He also found a 'M' and an 'O'.
Chandler: We think he was trying to spell out 'MONKEY'.
Phoebe: (Singing) They're tiny and chubby and so sweet to touch.
But soon they'll grow up and resent you so much.
Now they're yelling at you and you don't know why.
You cry and you cry and you cry.
And you cry and you ...
(Ross gives her some money) Oh, thank you Ross.
Ross: Yeah, I'm paying you to stop.
