Ryan Howard Quotes
If I had to, I could clean out my desk in five seconds, and nobody would ever know that I'd ever been here. And I'd forget, too.
Ryan
Michael: Mmm... what flavor coffee is that... updog?
Ryan: What?
Michael: I dunno, nothing, what's up with you?
Ryan: Huh?
Toby: [watches Ryan bite his string cheese] Wow, you just dive right in.
Ryan: You know, around age 12, I just started going for it.
I ground up four extra-strength Aspirin and put them in Michael's pudding. I do the same with my dog to get him to take his heartworm medicine.
Ryan
Michael: I wanted all of you to take a look at a few of the many, many disabled icons who have contributed so much to our society.
Jim: Quick question, uhh, why is Tom Hanks on the wall?
Ryan: Twice?
Michael: Good question. Forrest Gump — mentally challenged, Philadelphia — AIDS.
Kevin: I think that's from Big.
Michael: I don't think so, no.
Kelly: Yeah, he's dancing on a piano with Robert Loggia.
Michael: He grew into a man overnight. Rare disability. It still works.
Phyllis: Everyone, this is my boyfriend Bob.
Kevin: Kevin Malone.
Bob Vance: Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration.
Stanley: Stanley Hudson.
Bob Vance: Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration.
Ryan: Ryan Howard.
Bob Vance: Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration.
Ryan: What line of work you in, Bob?
Ryan: Hey, is Katy coming?
Jim: I have not really talked to her lately.
Ryan: Do you mind if I give her a call?
Jim: We can talk about that later.
Michael: Attention please. Jan Levinson's coming very soon and so we're going to have our weekly suggestion box meeting. So you can get in your constructive compliments ASAP.
Ryan: Don't you mean "constructive criticism?"
Michael: What did I say?
Kelly: You said "constructive compliments." That doesn't make any sense.
Pam: Wait, are those Michael's Levi's?
Ryan: Yeah. Who dry cleans jeans?
Michael: For emergency contact put down Todd F. Packer. You know what the "F" stands for?
Ryan: Fudge?
I can't believe I started the fire.
Ryan: [reads Packer's WLHUNG license plate] You a big William Hung fan?
Todd: Why does everybody ask me that? Who the hell is that?!