Favorite Sock Quotes
Sock: Sam! Listen. Here's what we're going to do. We need to get our stories straight, okay. People are going to come here, they're going to ask questions. We have to have answers ready.
Sam: But our friend is dead!
Sock: Ben would want us to have a cover-up story for the cops and that is a fact, Sam.
Sock: Your ladyhood is a very very special thing. It's like a... you know, it's like a super awesome hot tub. And if you just let anybody hop into that tub, it becomes meaningless. It becomes filled with hair and you have to clean it out all the time.
Kristen: I hate dirty hot tubs.
Sock: We all do
It's like she's water-boarding my boys, Sammy. They're constantly blue
Sock [about Kristen wrestling with him]
Ben: So I went to the mall alone...
Sock: Sure.
Ben: ...to buy a couple of pairs of pants.
Sock: I'm sorry. You bought a couple of pairs of pants? Since when do you need more than one pair of pants? What are you, Jude Law?
Sock: Yeah, Nina, nice. I like a girl who eats like a trucker.
Nina: Thank you, Sock
Boxing requires focus. You know what it's like? It's like having sex. All right, everything's going good, right? You're getting your groove on, chugging along. In comes the talking, the hints, the tips, the criticizing. The next thing you know, you've lost that concentration, you're locked in the bathroom yelling at your own lap!
Dude, it's freezing in here. What the hell man? Hear that sound? That was my nipples crystallizing into diamonds on my chest
Sock [entering Sam's car]
Mr. Oliver, I'm really really glad that you're alive and everything but... I just about had a heart attack. I think I might still be having one.
Gladys [about the baby]: Oh, an IBOH.
Sock: What's an IBOH?
Gladys: Intentional Birth Out of Hell. It happens. Souls have been known to escape from Hell to have their children here. Better schools
Tony: Plus, I came to warn you, I think they're dispatching some demon assassins to kill you.
Sock: Oh, we know. Ben's dating one of them.
Ben: Yeah, we're a power couple
You know, it's like your talking. I can hear the stupid words coming out of your mouth but they have no meaning.
Sock: Okay, if we were meeting at the bar right now. I would probably try and pick you up with my best line.
Kristen: Okay.
Sock: Okay. Ahem. Excuse me. Hi. I think you're standing on my penis.
Kristen: I'm not sure I understand, but it sounds charming
