TV Fanatic Works Better with Prime Instant Video
40,000 other titles are available to watch now.

Andi: So. What are you going to do with your new freedom?
Sam: I might learn a new language.
Andi: Really?
Sam: No. I'll probably just nap a lot

Devil: Yeah, would you look at that, huh? Makes me sick. All the CO2 spewing in the air, polluting our planet, choking our beautiful Mother Earth. Did you know that global warming is the biggest threat facing us today?
Sam: Really? You care about global warming?
Devil: Yes, I care. Because it could destroy our planet. And if that happens, that jackass upstairs can count all the casualties as innocents. That means I won't get any of the souls. Zero. So yeah, man, I'm goin' green

I came to America as a girl. But because of you I leave it as a woman who has discovered both her sexuality and her ability to manage an extended-stay hotel.

Kristen

I talked to your dad already, and once he gets tired of beating me, we can eventually be happy together, you and me

Sock

Something good happened here today, boys. The geek escaped from Hell. Geek banged a cougar. Geek walks away a little less of a geek. And we helped. Looks like we're his fairy bone-mothers. That is a nice feeling

Sock

Sam: Well you'd better start connecting physically quick, because I've got a feeling you're running out of time.
Billy: I can't rush it, dude. It's not just about me. It's about Cindy's pleasure too. It says so right on the condom box

Nina: Can I tell you a secret?
Ben: Of course.
Nina: Okay. A long time ago, I had hemophobia.
Ben: That ain't right. My cousin's gay.
Nina: No, hemophobia. It's the fear of blood.
Ben: Well, you love blood.
Nina: I know. See, that's what's crazy. I just had to confront my fears. I immersed myself in it, and once I did that it was great, I loved it. And now I can bathe in it every single day.
Ben: That's... nice for you

Sam: Maybe Hell will think it's a mix-up. If not, we got to send Billy back.
Sock: Eh. Either way we get to enjoy the night air and desecrate a cemetery

Ben: Tomorrow night for our special anniversary, you and me, we're flying to the moon.
Nina: Baby, you would suffocate and freeze before we got there

Sam: It's a work problem. It's just.. it's for my other job.
Andi: Oh, well, can't Sock or Ben do it?
Sam: Well, this problem really needs somebody who's... smart.
Andi: Oh. I can see your dilemma

You know, in the old days I used to get the souls that ate shrimp. Can you imagine how unsatisfying that was?

Devil

Nina: You know what, there is something that I want to do. It's something that's really important to me. I think it will take our relationship to the next level.
Ben: Reverse cowgirl?

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 233 in total

Reaper Quotes

Hey, no shame in community college, K-Fed. I almost went

Sock

Sam [about the vessels]: Wait. So, they're not all little vacuums?
DMV Demon: The boss gives you the vessel he thinks you can handle. You must be a real moron