Season 2, Episode 8: "The Home Stretch"
Andi: So. What are you going to do with your new freedom?Sam: I might learn a new language.
Andi: Really?
Sam: No. I'll probably just nap a lot
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Devil: Yeah, would you look at that, huh? Makes me sick. All the CO2 spewing in the air, polluting our planet, choking our beautiful Mother Earth. Did you know that global warming is the biggest threat facing us today?
Sam: Really? You care about global warming?
Devil: Yes, I care. Because it could destroy our planet. And if that happens, that jackass upstairs can count all the casualties as innocents. That means I won't get any of the souls. Zero. So yeah, man, I'm goin' green
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Season 2, Episode 7: "The Good Soil"
Kristen: I came to America as a girl. But because of you I leave it as a woman who has discovered both her sexuality and her ability to manage an extended-stay hotel.• Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Sock: I talked to your dad already, and once he gets tired of beating me, we can eventually be happy together, you and me
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Sock: Something good happened here today, boys. The geek escaped from Hell. Geek banged a cougar. Geek walks away a little less of a geek. And we helped. Looks like we're his fairy bone-mothers. That is a nice feeling
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Sam: Well you'd better start connecting physically quick, because I've got a feeling you're running out of time.
Billy: I can't rush it, dude. It's not just about me. It's about Cindy's pleasure too. It says so right on the condom box
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Nina: Can I tell you a secret?
Ben: Of course.
Nina: Okay. A long time ago, I had hemophobia.
Ben: That ain't right. My cousin's gay.
Nina: No, hemophobia. It's the fear of blood.
Ben: Well, you love blood.
Nina: I know. See, that's what's crazy. I just had to confront my fears. I immersed myself in it, and once I did that it was great, I loved it. And now I can bathe in it every single day.
Ben: That's... nice for you
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Sam: Maybe Hell will think it's a mix-up. If not, we got to send Billy back.
Sock: Eh. Either way we get to enjoy the night air and desecrate a cemetery
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Ben: Tomorrow night for our special anniversary, you and me, we're flying to the moon.
Nina: Baby, you would suffocate and freeze before we got there
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Sam: It's a work problem. It's just.. it's for my other job.
Andi: Oh, well, can't Sock or Ben do it?
Sam: Well, this problem really needs somebody who's... smart.
Andi: Oh. I can see your dilemma
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Total Quotes: 233
