Favorite Ted Mosby Quotes
Stella: Ah the butterfly tramp stamp, my bread and butter. So I'm guessing that the real stories involves a bad break up and some booze, unless it's a gang tattoo in which case I thinks time to, find a new gang.
Ted: Ah no, I just thought it would be cool to get a caterpillar tattoo, then a few weeks went by and all of the sudden
Ted: Okay, guys, I gotta say something, I think my feelings for Robin may be resurfacing.
Lily: Oh, please, they were buried in a shallow grave
Ted: I mean, do you know what you're gonna want for lunch ten weeks from now?
Marshall: Sloppy Joe, shrimp cocktail, and a milkshake.
Hey look at me - I promise I will not fall in love with your roommate.
Sarah: Hi, I'm Dr. O'Brien.
Ted: I'm Architect Mosby. Sorry, I just wanted to say my job, too
Sarah: Ted, just calm down.
Ted: Calm down! You're my only match! There was a computer and there were 8 fish in the sea full of lesbians
Ted: What's Lily gonna say when she finds out.
Marshall: Lily's not going to find out. I have a system.
[five seconds later]
Lily: You smoked.
Marshall: Dammit!
Barney: I need you to help me pick the suit I'm gonna wear when I walk down the aisle.
Ted: Ok, Robin walks down the aisle you wait at the end of it.
Barney: Ok then the suit I'll be wearing when they all stand as I enter the chapel.
Ted: Also her.
Ted: So, you are mad about me and Robin holding hands.
Barney: Of course I'm mad Ted. Holding hands is like the fourth grade equivalent of banging. Well in your case, twelfth grade. Self five!
Robin: What are you doing here?
Ted: Oh, you know, uh, just shopping for, uh... dip. I love dip. Well, I don't love dip, I like dip. As a friend
He's gotten really respectful with his fake listening.
Ted: You did not convince her you were Neil Armstrong. The moon landing took place seven years before you were born.
Barney: Ted, baby doll. Minor hurdle.
