The guy's been with five women his whole life. Not because he can't get 'em - he's loyal. He's emotional and reactive, a little Jack Russell terrier. And listen to me, Sloan. He will kill for you and this baby. He's moving to New York even if you're not together. He loves you, Sloan. Always has and nothing else matters. E's your family now, and whatever your father thinks of him he's going to have to get over it. Unless...you're sure you are.

Vince: We basically lived together our whole lives.
Billy: Hey maybe you'll all live together with the kid. It'll be like 'Three Men and a Little Lady.'
Vince: Yeah, and if E has a boy it'll be like three men and two little men.

Vince: Now let's see you top that news.
Turtle, Billy and Drama: Sloan's pregnant.

Vince: I think I'm getting married.
Turtle: What?
Billy: Come on, Vince.
Vince: I'm serious, I'm actually in love with this woman.
Drama: What was the sex that good?
Vince: Yes, but that's not it.
Turtle: It's either that or you're back on drugs.
Vince: I'm clearer than I've ever been.
Drama: Well did you drug her?

Johnny Drama: Bro, didn't I used to bang her sister?
Vince: Yeah, actually she said she asked about you.
Drama: Of course.
Turtle: She probably wants to find out if you were the one who gave her the herps.
Drama: Well at least I get laid often enough to be a suspect.
Eric: Interesting logic.

Vince: Turtle, how many relationships have I had?
Turtle: Huh?
Vince: Deep, real, meaningful relationships.
Turtle: Not counting us?
Vince: Women.
Turtle: I don't think any.

Vince: Hey, there's my motherf*cker. Get it?
Eric: Oh I get it, hilarious.
Johnny Drama: I don't get it.
Turtle: Mother f*cker. E f*cked the mother.
Drama: Oh you mean step mother f*cker. I get it! That's funny bro.

Turtle: It says Sofia got a first from Oxford.
Vince: What's a first?
Turtle: I don't know. It's gotta be better than a second though.
Vince: Oxford is a pretty good school.
Turtle: Where do you think we would've gone if we went to college?
Vince: Probably not Oxford.
Turtle: Nah, probably not.

Vince: What else you got?
Turtle: I got a nude image of her. Pretty sure it's doctored, though.
Vince: How do you know?
Turtle: Because I doctored it.

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