On my deathbed, my final wish is to have my ex-wives rush to my side so I can use my dying breath to tell them both to go to hell one last time.

Ron

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Ron Swanson Quotes, Parks and Recreation Season 2 Episode 8 Quotes, Parks & Rec Quotes
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Parks and Recreation Season 2 Episode 8 Quotes

I have never taken the high road. But I tell other people to, 'cause then there's more room for me on the low road.

Tom

I'm a simple man. I like pretty, dark-haired women and breakfast food. But this stock photo I bought at a framing store isn't real. Today I got the real thing. A naked Tammy made me breakfast this morning. I should have taken a picture of it.

Ron