Favorite 2 Broke Girls Quotes
Michael: I love her, so Madeline Stowe in Revenge.
Caroline: I don't watch that.
Stephen: We love it.
Michael: It's about a young blonde woman who is taking revenge on all the people who destroyed her life.
Caroline: Yeah, too close to home.
You can't give hipsters a microphone, that's like throwing gasoline on a pretentious fire!
Max
I don't cry. I sold my tear ducts to an organ bank for cash two years ago.
Max
Max: Oh my God, you have a shoe rotisserie!
Caroline: I designed it. I call it my Ferris Heels.
Max: I'd judge you if that wasn't exactly what I'd call it if I had one.
Detective: He lived alone, been dead two weeks
Max: Cats eat his face?
Caroline: Max! Can you not be so dark?
Max: Kittens eat his face?
Stop fighting it, just give into it...why am I quoting a rapist?
Max
I don't think life likes to be grabbed by the balls
Max
I know they're smart because they're the first people to order the Croque Monsieur as Croque Monsieur and not Crock Monster.
Caroline
You go to France you eat snails, you come here you cry.
Max [about crying in Goodwill]
Max: Did Wile E. Coyote just come into the diner?
Caroline: No, but my ex-boyfriend did.
Max: Mip mip.
Caroline: Did you really think it's fiscally smart to be taking in strays?
Max: Good point. Move out tonight!
This can't be about my drinking. I don't have the money to be a real alcoholic.
Max
