[on his harmonica] Oh, you mean my mouth radio.

Kenneth

[to Tracy] This is decadent. And I once went to Miami with Daryl Strawberry.

Jack

Somewhere right now a guy is on a J-Date with Monica Lewinsky. Nobody's perfect.

Jack

My God. I already put my wedding announcement in Cigar Aficionado.

Jack

Oh for God's sake, what is this, Third Watch?

Jenna

[to Jack, in "What The Frak?" shirt] I'm sorry to tell you such a dark tale in such a silly shirt.

Elisa

Blue writing on green ... why?!?

Liz

Elisa has a big secret! My current theory is that she's the mother of those Michael Jackson kids!

Liz

I called 911. They wouldn't even connect with their celebrity service.

Jenna

Wigco.com? Sheinhardt's Wig's user-generated content site. All that anybody ever posted on it were penises.

Jack

Really? That's your guess? I'm a man?

Elisa

You're wise, Liz Lemon. Like a genetically-manipulated shark.

Tracy

30 Rock Season 3 Quotes

Don Geiss: If you're watching this, you are an executive of the General Electric Corporation, and the unthinkable has happened. Capitalism is ending, either because of the Soviets or something ridiculous, like a woman President. I'm speaking to you from the year 1987, but the message is timeless: Avoid The Noid!

If there's one thing I learned from you, Jack, it's to keep your friends close and your enemies so close that you're almost kissing.

Devon