Archer
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on FXFavorite Archer Quotes
Lana, this isn't entirely about race.
Cheryl: You're all jealous of my fall-back career!"
Pam: As what, an ACTUAL acorn?
Lana: Screw you, Mr My-mother's-a-lying-bitch-and-I'm-too-stupid-to-realize-my-life's-a-pathetic-joke! Archer: Nice to meet you, Mrs Hello-my-kid's-from-a-sperm-bank-since-I-can't-keep-a-man-because-in-addition-to-my-jillion-neuroses-I-have-a-weird-looking-vagina!
That's racist. Jingoist. Whatever.
Archer: I thought you were gonna shoot me.
Lana: The day's not over.
My great-grandfather was nuts for skating. That and the Klan.
Cheryl
Lana: I could start smoking crak today and he'd still turn out better than you.
Archer: Why is that, because I never had a father, Lana? So why don't you shut up and then also marry me?!
Archer: Since when?
Malory: Since this new thing called "always?"
Can I just put what I assume is your rock collection on the stupid train?
Pam
Noah: How much of my blood does he need?
Lana: I dunno, 10 gils?
Archer: It's the A-Team meets Scarface. That makes me...uh...
Lana: Hannibal Montana?
Cyril: I'm sorry, the money is where?
Archer: Uh, in your masturbators, you idiot.