Arrested Development

Arrested Development

FOX
Season: 3 2 1

Arrested Development Quotes (Page 6)

Season 3 Episode 8: "Making a Stand"

Buster: And that's why you don't use one-armed persons to teach lessons!
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
J. Weatherman: And that's why you don't try to teach lessons to your father!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Michael: Buster's good hand just came flying off.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Season 3 Episode 7: "Prison Break-In"

Warden Gentles: (after a failed allusion) I don't know why I always assume that everyone has read my screenplay.
 • Rating: Unrated
George Michael: The new facility's pretty nice. It's like school ... but air-conditioned.
 • Rating: Unrated
(After Tobias falls down the stairs)
Gob: (talking about the camera) Oh, no! It was on stand by! Think you could do that again?
 • Rating: Unrated
Michael: I don't need to take my Mom to a gala, ok? Only losers go to those things with their parents. I'm going with my son.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Tobias: Oh, come on. Don't leave your Uncle T-Bag hanging!
George Michael: Please don't call yourself that.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Michael: Mom wants to sleep with the warden.
Gob: What? Oh, God!
Lindsay: Great.
Michael: Great? The man is old enough to be her contemporary, Lindsay.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Michael: The whole thing is a scam. Mom was just using that warden to try to get Dad out. She's not trying to seduce him at all.
Lindsay: Oh, no, she is. She's spending the night with him. She just called to ask me to bring her a tube of vag ... table paste.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Gob: It's a jet-pack, Michael. What could possibly go wrong?
 • Rating: 4.3 / 5.0
Lucille: I want to cry so badly, but I don't think I can spare the moisture.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Lindsay: Did it ever occur to you that maybe Warden Gentiles likes her?
Michael: Likes her what?
Lindsay: No, I mean, likes her. Like, is attracted to her.
Michael: Who's the "her" in that sentence?
Lindsay: Mom. Warden Gentiles likes Mom.
Michael: Her?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Warden Gentiles: I might have you beaten with a pillowcase full of batteries.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Tobias: I'm afraid I'm with Michael on this. The guy runs a prison. He can have any piece of ass he wants.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Narrator: Buster had recently brought home a turtle in an incredibly misguided attempt to make his mother jealous.
Buster: You can stay in this box that Uncle/Father Oscar left behind.
Narrator: In fact, it was a box of Oscar's legally obtained medical marijuana.
Buster: Oh, good, you've already got grass.
Narrator: Primo bud. Real sticky weed.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Benefit Attendee: I'd rather contribute to TBA!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Gob: Sounds like a tennis match between Steffi Graf and Happy Days star Donny Host.
Narrator: That's 'Most'!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
George Michael: Is that a screenplay? Warden Gentles' screenplay?
Maeby: That's what you're going to tell me.
 • Rating: Unrated
Lucille: You can smuggle yourself out because I'm staying in the conjugal trailer with Warden Gentles.
George, Sr.: Him?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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Season: 3 2 1
Total Season 3 Quotes: 218
Total Arrested Development Quotes: 1002
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