Arrested Development Season 1 Quotes (Page 25)
Season 1 Episode 4: "Key Decisions"

Gob: Is there a private bathroom nearby?
George, Sr.: You're looking at it. (taps the commode between the bunks)
Gob: No, no, no. I can't use that. I need privacy. Yeah, I've always been that way. I can't go without privacy. I can't pass this key without privacy.
George, Sr.: Well, I could ask the guys to leave, but, uh ... you know, they've been locking the doors lately. I don't know.
• Rating: Unrated
George Michael: You know, I can see why your mom likes it. It is a really nice tree ...
Maeby: We've got to get it torn down.
George Michael: ... That must die. Stupid tree.
• Rating: Unrated
Lucille: Buster's out of control!
Michael: What, another panic attack?
Buster: Me? No. She's just wigged out because I have a girlfriend.
Lucille: A waiter hands him a note, suddenly he's Steve McQueen.
• Rating: Unrated
Gob: I'm a complete failure.
George, Sr.: Where'd you get that kind of talk?
Gob: From you. You always say that about me.
George, Sr.: Well, maybe you're not entirely to blame. I haven't always been the best kind of father either.
Gob: Dad, you've done a pretty good job of being a father to everybody in here. What have they got that I don't? I mean, you've never even ... thrown a ball around with me.
George, Sr.: Great. Now, you're an athlete.
• Rating: Unrated
Buster: Has your hair always been that pointy, Miss Austero?
Lucille 2: It's Lucille.
Buster: Right, right. That's my mom's name.
• Rating: Unrated
Gob: You've got nothing to worry about. We're going to be together for a long time.
Marta: We're a family now. I am so happy. I'm going to call the kids.
Gob: (to himself after Marta leaves) I've made a huge mistake.
• Rating: Unrated
Surgeon: Looks like the shiv would have done some real damage if it hadn't been for this. It was in your lower intestine.
(Surgeon shows Gob the key)
Gob: So close.
• Rating: Unrated
Michael: Look, I'm trying to get development started. I've got six guys on bulldozers waiting to get underway.
Lindsay: Well, what about the trees?
Michael: Oh, we're just gonna cover them with blankets ... I'm ripping 'em out.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 1 Episode 3: "Bringing Up Buster"

(Referring to the cornballer machine the family still has)
Lucille: Everyone's laughing, and riding, and cornholing except Buster.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
(Buster is jumping and falling all over the place trying to catch a bird that flew into the house)
Lucille: Buster!
Buster: It's a bird!
Lucille: I know it's a bird. I'm on the phone!
Buster: It walked on my pillow!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
(Referring to how George Michael and Maeby should do the kiss in the play)
Tobias: With fully formed libidos, not two young men playing grab-ass in the shower.
• Rating: Unrated
George Sr.: I never see you anymore, Michael.
Michael: You're in prison. And I was here yesterday.
George Sr. : Oh, yeah, that's... That's... I'm sorry. I couldn't break away from the poker game. Capital-G was down to his boxers.
Michael: Strip poker?
George Sr.: Yeah, and it's tough. We can really only play about... Two hands.
• Rating: Unrated
(After yawning for a long time)
Buster: (To Michael) Wow. We're just blowing through nap time, aren't we?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Michael: You were flying today, buddy.
Buster: Yes, I was flying. But a little too close to the sun.
Lucille: You let him go in the sun? (To Buster) Get in the back seat. I'll be right out.
Buster: Front seat, mom. I sit in the front seat now.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Gob: And if I'm going to be staying here...
Lucille: Staying here? What, did that Mexican throw you out?
Gob: She's not "that Mexican", Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Colombian or something. Anyway, it's over.
Lucille: You've got three days.
Gob: Hey... If I can't find a horny immigrant by then, I don't deserve to stay here.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
George Sr.: (Regarding Buster) Maybe it was the eleven months he spent in the womb. The doctor said there were claw marks on the walls of her uterus. But he was her 'miracle baby'. And I-I was just too burnt out on raising you guys to care. So... He turned out a little soft, you know...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Buster: It's like she gets off by being withholding.
Gob: Look who's got something to say.
Buster: I'm Mom and I want to shoot down everything you say so I can feel good about myself. 'Cause I'm an uptight -- BLEEP -- Buster -- You old horny slut!
Michael: Well, no one's gonna top that.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Michael: I gotta say, buddy, I'm in pretty good shape! You could be eating my dust all day long!
Buster: Well, you might -- (long extended BLEEP with Buster pointing excitedly)!
Michael: Let's hope it doesn't come to that.
• Rating: Unrated
(Michael leans on the Corn Baller)
Michael: Mother of God! Ohh... Every damn time! Aww... This is a big one...
• Rating: Unrated
Gob: Let me ask you something. Is this a business decision, or is it personal? 'Cause if it's business, I'll go away happily. But if it's personal, I'll go away, but I won't be happy.
Michael: It's personal.
Buster: I am so sorry.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
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Total Season 1 Quotes: 574
Total Arrested Development Quotes: 1094



