Cougar Town "Pilot" Quotes
Jules: All the single guys our age are either broken, gay or chasing younger girls
• Rating: Unrated
Josh: What's that scar from?
Jules: I got knifed as a kid
Josh: Really?
Jules: No, that's from my c-section!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Jules [to her cub]: Do you want a snack? That's what I do when my kid's friends come over. Do you like crackers with peanut butter?
• Rating: Unrated
Jules: You can't wear fake nails on just one hand, it makes you look like a crazy whore
Laurie: I only had four left and this is the hand I smoke with
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Jules: I'm guessing the boy I flashed goes to your school
Travis: Yes he does
Jules: Is he single? ... Kidding! Why don't you ever laugh at my jokes?
Travis: Because they make me sad
• Rating: Unrated
Jules: You see that young gentleman there, I'd love to lick his body
Woman: That's my son
Jules: Ooh, he looks smart
• Rating: Unrated
Jules: When a 40-something guy gets divorced, it's always: "Way to go, Tiger!"
Grayson: We don't call each other Tiger. It's always Champ, or Samurai.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 7