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Family-guy

Peter: You gonna eat that stapler?
Calahan: Umm... you can't eat a-
Peter: Wanna split it?

Chris: Are you sure this'll work?
Peter: Chris, this is just another one of your crazy schemes.
Chris: But this whole thing was your idea.
Peter: You'll find out.
Chris: Dad, you're not makin' any sense.
Peter: You just leave that to me

Lois, anyone who wouldn't pretend their own son is dyin' to get the Gumble's back on TV is a racist. There. I said it

Peter

Peter: I'll handle it Lois. I read a book about this sort of thing once.
Brian: Are you sure it was a book? Are you sure it wasn't nothing?
Peter: Oh yeah

Peter: When did God ever say he didn't want someone else being worshipped like him?
Lois: It's one of the Ten Commandments.
Peter: Oh, come on Lois, those were written like 200 years ago. Times have changed

Hey Lois, give Chris a break. I mean, no TV? So he failed a class, it's not like he felt up his cousin in the garage that one time when I was

Peter

Brian: Peter, this is the final plague!
Peter: Good cause this is starting to get old

Peter: I want to have the kind of father and son relationship that the Gumbels have.
Lois: Peter, the Gumbels are brothers.
Peter: Oh nice Lois, just because they're black we can't learn anything from 'em?

Brian: Peter, the final plague is the death of the first born son.
Peter: Oh no Stewie!
Brian: The first born son.
Peter: Meg!
Brian: Your wife.
Peter: Chris

Peter: Hey Stewie. I see your bum.
Stewie: Well take a good look, fat man. And while you're at it, take pictures so I have something to bring with me to court, you wretched pervert

Displaying all 10 quotes

Family Guy Season 2 Episode 9 Quotes

Brian: Peter, the final plague is the death of the first born son.
Peter: Oh no Stewie!
Brian: The first born son.
Peter: Meg!
Brian: Your wife.
Peter: Chris

Peter: Hey Stewie. I see your bum.
Stewie: Well take a good look, fat man. And while you're at it, take pictures so I have something to bring with me to court, you wretched pervert

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