Flight of the Conchords Season 1 Episode 3: "Mugged" Quotes
Murray: I get ridiculed all the time.
Bret: Really?
Murray: Yep. "Ah hey... ginger balls!" you know.
Jermaine: That was Bret... he called you that.
Bret: Oh, the other night?
Murray: Well, it's not just you Bret, it's all the time, and it's not just ginger balls, you know?
Bret: I thought that was your nickname
Murray: No! I get umm... "Oh what are you on your way to a dick meeting?"
Bret: I have 15 dollars.
Mugger: Great, give me that.
Bret: It's in the bank.
Mugger: No! We don't have time to go to the bank.
Jemaine: We might just have time
Mel: You're out? Did the cops try to strip search you?
Jemaine: No.
Mel: Did they find anything?
Jemaine: No, they didn't strip search me.
Mel: Oh, I.. I thought you said they did.
Jemaine: No.
Mel: Oh, well, did any of your cellmates, you know, rape you in the a...
Jemaine: No. No no no.
Mel: Oh good, good. Cause if... if I was a convict, you know, and I was in a cell with a pretty boy like you, I would definitely wait till lights out, put my hand over your mouth--
Jemaine: I've gotta... I've gotta go.
Murray: He may be dead.
Dave: He maybe did what?
Murray: He may be dead.
Dave: I know, but what did he maybe do?
Murray: He may be dead.
Dave: Yeah, maybe he did, maybe he didn't. What did he maybe do?
Bret: No, he may be dead.
Dave: Are you guys fucking with me?
Mugger: What is this? Why does this phone have a camera glued to it?
Bret: It's a camera phone. Jemaine wanted one for his birthday.
Mugger [to other mugger]: Look at this. [To Bret]: Oh yeah? Where'd you get it?
Bret: I made it. It's homemade.
Mugger: Yeah, it's a piece of shit.
Bret: Well, how come Jemaine likes it so much?
Jemaine: You can have it