Friends

Friends "The One with Two Parts (1)" Quotes

Joey: Hey Pheebs, guess who we saw today.
Phoebe: Ooh, oh fun. Okay. Liam Neeson.
Joey: No.
Phoebe: Morley Safer.
Joey: No.
Phoebe: The woman who cuts my hair!
Monica: Okay, look, this could be a really long game.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Susan: Why do I have to be the mommy?
Ross: OK. I'm gonna play my sperm card one more time.
 • Rating: Unrated

Joey: Pheebs, you think it would be okay if I asked out your sister?
Phoebe: Why? Why would you wanna do that?
Joey: So that if we went out on a date, she'd be there.
Phoebe: Well, I mean, I'm not my sister's, you know, whatever, and um... I mean, it's true, we were one egg, once, but er, you know, we've grown apart, so, um... I don't know, why not? Okay!
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: You know that thing, when you and I talk to each other about things?
Joey: Yeah...
Chandler: Let's not do that anymore.
 • Rating: Unrated

Carol: (To Ross about labor) Oh, what do you know?! No one's going up to you and saying, "Hi, is that your nostril? Mind if we push this pot roast through it?!"
 • Rating: Unrated

Joey: Hey, have you guys ever been to the Rainbow Room? Is it expensive?
Chandler: Only if you order stuff...
Joey: I'm taking Ursula there, it's her birthday.
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa! What about Phoebe's birthday?
Joey: When's that?
Ross: Tonight!
Joey: Oh, man... what are the odds of that happening?
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: Oh, Pheebs, I'm sorry, I've got to go. I've got Lamaze class.
Chandler: (Mocking) Oh, and I've got Earth Science, but I'll catch you in Gym.
 • Rating: Unrated

Chandler: Hey, where you been?
Joey: I went back to Riff's. I think Ursula likes me. All I ordered was coffee, she brought me a tuna melt and four plates of curly fries.
Chandler: Score.
 • Rating: Unrated

Mr. Douglas: We haven't seen an ANUS this bad since the 70's.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ross: I always knew I was having a baby. I just never realized the baby was having me.
 • Rating: Unrated

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