Gilmore Girls Season 1 Quotes
Emily: Well I just don't understand why you waited so late to call! Are you sure? Fine! Alright, yes! Goodbye (hangs up the phone).
Richard: What's the problem, Emily?
Emily: The problem is, that apparently Florence could not get here because of the storm.
Richard: Florence?
Emily: Our cook.
Richard: Ah. Well, we'll just have to go out then.
Emily: Please, Richard pay attention. We can't go out, it's miserable out there.
Richard: Well we'll figure something out dear.
Emily: What?! What will we figure out? I hate the damn snow!
Richard: Emily, calm down.
Emily: This is a serious problem. These Friday night dinners are the only proper food that child eats all week.
Richard: (Calls out to Rory who's sitting in the dining room) Rory? Are you in any way malnurished or in need of some international relief organization to recrute a celebrity to raise money on your account?
Rory: I'm good.
Richard: She's good, Emily.
Emily: Your sense of humor rears its ugly head at the oddest of times, Richard.
Richard: I'm not the mastermind behind some great scheme to spoil your dinner plans and I don't care to be treated as such.
Emily: So you're fine with having no dinner tonight, is that it?
Richard: I certainly am not.
Rory: (enters from the dining room) How 'bout I check the fridge? I'm sure there's something in there we could whip up.
Emily: Whip up? (says it like it's a new concept)
Rory: Yeah, come on. It'll be fun, I promise.
Emily: Well come on Mr.-We'll-Figure-It-Out! (they're all standing in front of the refridgerator) Nothing!
Richard: Not a blessed thing.
Rory: There's frozen pizza!
Emily: How in the world did that get there?
Rory: Maybe you bought it and forgot about it.
Emily: I have never bought frozen pizza, it must belong to Anna.
Richard: The maid?
Emily: Yes.
Richard: Ah, got one!
Emily: (Rory pulls the pizza out) What are you doing?
Rory: I'm gonna make it.
Emily: Oh Rory, you're not serious.
Richard: That hardly looks like dinner.
Emily: I agree. Rory, that's food you eat a carnival, or in a Turkish prison.
Rory: I promise you're gonna love it.
Emily: But-
Rory: Listen. Just leave it up to me. You guys go back into the living room and I'll call you when it's ready. (Emily and Richard both give in and get ready to leave) Hey Grandma.
Emily: (she and Richard both turn around) Yes?
Rory: What are the odds of you knowing where a cookie sheet would be?
Richard: I'd say very slim (Emily gives him a death glare).
Rory: Okay, never mind. I'll find it.
Emily: (looks at Richard before they leave) Very slim? Thank you for that.
Mayor: I have been mayor of this fine town for a long time. I tend to think of all of you as my children. Unfortunately, sometimes children have to be disciplined. Now I'm going to say something and I'm only gonna say it once. . .we have leash laws, people.
Lorelai: Daddy's getting angry.
Lorelai: Wait, close your eyes and breathe. I smell snow.
Rory: Ah, it's that time of year.
Lorelai: Can't you smell it?
Rory: You know, it's like dogs and high-pitched noises. I think it's something only you can smell.
(Rory sits down next to Lorelai and pulls a blanket over the both of them)
Lorelai: I love snow.
Rory: Really, I had no idea.
Lorelai: Everything's magical when it snows, everything looks pretty. The clothes are great. Coats, scarves, gloves, hats.
Rory: Thermal underwear, wool socks, ear flaps.
Lorelai: (asking about the weather) Hey, how is it out there?
Michel: It is cold and gray, like a fat, dead pigeon.
Michel: You do know that not everyone finds the idea of being pelted with frozen water appealing.
Lorelai: I know, and how sad for them.
Michel: The thrilling sensation of getting lost in a blizzard, of freezing to death in the woods and having to eat your friend's buttocks to stay alive: that is lost on many people.
(to Michel) I am telling you five minutes in a snowball fight we could knock that stick right out of your butt.
Lorelai
Emily: (talking to Lorelai over the phone) Have you seen the news?
Lorelai: Ever?
Emily: A bad storm is heading your way. It's already hitting us here.
Lorelai: Well, don't panic. I'll get the ark, you get the animals.
Lorelai: Michel, it's the first snowfall of the season. It's very lucky! Make a wish!
Michel: Get away from me.
Lorelai: Oh, you're not supposed to say it out loud.
(Michel answers the phone.)
Lorelai: (to herself) The world changes when it snows. It's quiet. Everything softens.
Michel: It's your mother.
Lorelai: And then the rain comes.
(about Max) Okay, well, if it makes you feel any better, while he's being sexy, he's also being grammatically correct.
Lorelai
Twelve guys stood in a row all night waiting for an enemy that never showed. They got stood up. They should've been wearing prom dresses.
Luke
Lorelai: One of us has got to do laundry tonight.
Rory: Why?
Lorelai: Because I haven't had any clean underwear for three days.
Rory: So right now under your skirt you're wearing..?
Lorelai: Not underwear.
Rory: MOM!
Lorelai: Kind of nice actually, breezy.
Rory: My role model ladies and gentlemen.
Lorelai: That Lothario over there has wormed his way into my daughter's heart and mouth and for that he must die!
Luke: That's it, let's go.
