It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia Season 2 Quotes

Season 2 Episode 10: "Dennis and Dee Get a New Dad"

Mac: Well, maybe it boils down to this smart guy: computers are for losers.
Dennis: You're drinking a beer at eight o'clock in the morning!
Mac: Whatever dude. Irrelevant.
 • Rating: Unrated

Charlie: Did you send him a friend request?
Frank: I don't want to be his friend. I want to shoot him in the face!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Frank: How could you do that?
Barbara: I'm sorry. Would you rather I had them aborted? (looks at Dennis and Dee) Children would you like to have been aborted?
 • Rating: Unrated

Mac: Then we promise that we will come back with our butts filled.
Charlie: So filled! So filled for you!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Frank: Barbara. Your turkey neck is looking exceptionally attractive this evening.
Barbara: You have turned into a retarded person
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Mac: Do you want to shove heroin into your ass?
Charlie: Dude, I don't want to shove anything in my ass!
Mac: All right! This is the perfect opportunity to prove how hard we are, and not have to shove anything up our asses!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 2 Episode 9: "Charlie Goes America All Over Everybody's Ass"

Mac: Oh, man, New Orleans really had their s**t figured out!
Dennis: Oh, they totally had their s**t figured out! Except for the levees.
Mac: Right, yeah, except for the levees.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Mac: This music sounds like whales raping each other.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dee: Where is your breath?
Charlie: In my mouth?
Dee: No, no. It starts in your chest. You got to focus on your diaphragm.
Charlie: What the hell's a diaphragm?
 • Rating: Unrated

Charlie: You know what? Let me kick down a little thing to you that our founding fathers kicked down to me. It goes don't tread on me. And right now, you guy's are treading all over me!
 • Rating: Unrated

Dennis: Failure implies that she actually tried to be an actor.
Dee: Okay, I did try. It just didn't happen to work out.
Frank: It's not your fault, sweetie. You're just not pretty enough.
Dee: Oh, thank you. That's my dad, everybody.
 • Rating: Unrated

Charlie: I am done with rat detail. That's by far the worst job in the bar.
Dennis: Well, that's why we call it Charlie work.
 • Rating: Unrated

Mac: This is why people flock to places like Las Vegas and New Orleans and spring break. Because they're free to go wild. The girls go wild. The girls in Philly need a place to go wild.
Dennis: Yeah, right. I mean New Orleans was washed away in that terrible, terrible storm. We need to open up Paddy's as a haven for freedom.
Mac: Yes.
Dennis: A replacement for the tragic loss of New Orleans.
 • Rating: Unrated

Charlie: I'm gonna rise up, I'm gonna to kick a little ass, I'm gonna to kick some ass in the U.S.A., gonna climb a mountain, gonna sew a flag, gonna fly on an eagle. I'm gonna kick some butt, I'm gonna drive a big truck, I'm gonna rule this world, I'm gonna kick some ass, I'm gonna rise up, I'm gonna kick a little ass. ROCK, FLAG, and EAGLE!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dee: I am not a failure!
Mac: Dennis, what is it that you call it when somebody tries to do something but doesn't succeed?
Dennis: Uh, that would in fact be a failure.
 • Rating: Unrated

Frank: Look, I didn't go to Vietnam just to have pansies like you take my freedom away from me.
Dee: You went to Vietnam in 1993 to open up a sweatshop!
Frank: ...and a lot of good men died in that sweatshop!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 2 Episode 8: "The Gang Runs for Office"

Frank: A woman in politics is like a donkey doing calculus.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Mac: Gentlemen, sorry we couldn't work anything out, but I gotta go home and pay my taxes.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dennis: What's the note say?
Charlie: All right, yeah. All right, uh, "meet." It starts out "meet" and then there's, like, other stuff.
Dennis: "Meet me in the parking garage, Frank."
Charlie: Yeah?
Dennis: Yeah. You clearly have a learning disability, dude.
 • Rating: Unrated

Dennis: Am I supposed to vote for the Democrat who's going to blast me in the a** or the Republican who's blasting my a**?
Mac: See politics is all just one big a**-blast.
Dennis: It's a coast to coast,...
Charlie: You're going to get you're a**-blasted.
Dennis: ...nationwide a**-blasting.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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