Jersey Shore Season 3 Episode 3: "Where's the Beach?" Quotes
I'm a f**king good person!
Snooki
Snooki: Where's the beach?
Onlooker: It's right there. Where else would it be?
Every guy has a dream of having a threesome with two women, obviously. Maybe not with Deena and Snooki, but, um, I was going along with it only because it was a threesome.
Mike
I know that Deena wants to make out with Mike, but doesn't want to be too forward.
Snooki
Sammi: Look me in the face, and all the skeletons, lay it out right now, because I know.
Ronnie: What do you know?
Sammi: Everything
Ronnie: What is (bleeping) everything? What do you know?
Sammi: Tell me right now. Tell me.
Ronnie: Tell me what you know. I'm not (bleeping) doing this with you.
Sammi: Tell me.
My prediction is somebody needs to carry her (Deena) out of the club tonight.
Pauly
Old people, they lose their sex life and that's not a fun time... that's why people always get divorced.
Snooki
Seaside's so beautiful! Look at the garbage!
Pauly
I was lookin' for that threesome... it turned into just the D-some.
Situation
I need a mind condom because I'm being mind f*%ked.
Ronnie
Stop caring and f*%k me!
Snooki
It's like having chicken put on the table with salt and pepper, then somebody takes away the chicken and then you're left with salt and pepper.
Mike
