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I'm a f**king good person!


Snooki: Where's the beach?
Onlooker: It's right there. Where else would it be?

Every guy has a dream of having a threesome with two women, obviously. Maybe not with Deena and Snooki, but, um, I was going along with it only because it was a threesome.


I know that Deena wants to make out with Mike, but doesn't want to be too forward.


Sammi: Look me in the face, and all the skeletons, lay it out right now, because I know.
Ronnie: What do you know?
Sammi: Everything
Ronnie: What is (bleeping) everything? What do you know?
Sammi: Tell me right now. Tell me.
Ronnie: Tell me what you know. I'm not (bleeping) doing this with you.
Sammi: Tell me.

My prediction is somebody needs to carry her (Deena) out of the club tonight.


Old people, they lose their sex life and that's not a fun time... that's why people always get divorced.


Seaside's so beautiful! Look at the garbage!


I was lookin' for that threesome... it turned into just the D-some.


I need a mind condom because I'm being mind f*%ked.


Stop caring and f*%k me!


It's like having chicken put on the table with salt and pepper, then somebody takes away the chicken and then you're left with salt and pepper.

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 23 in total

Jersey Shore Season 3 Episode 3 Quotes

[to Sammi] Oh my God, bitch. You're such a whore. Why were you like that?


A lot of guys might think I'm crazy for not wanting to [have sex with Snooki].