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It's not like you're with your girlfriend, It's like you're taking care of your child.

Ronnie

Babe your whole f$#king a$$ is out.

Jionni

Snooki is wasted off her face, and Jionni is definitely pissed because he has to babysit Nicole.

Ronnie

I'm wearing my favorite necklace, my favorite watch ... fresh to death.

Pauly D

I don't know who I'm gonna make out with but it's gonna be someone good.

Deena

It's important to look your hottest the first night of Karma, just because if you don't look hot the first night of Karma, karma will get you.

Snooki

JWOWW: Wow you look really good.
Snooki: Would you bang me?
JWOWW: Bent over and sideways.

[to Pauly] Even though you a little off your A game, you're still gonna bring back b#@ches tonight and have sex. I'm just saying.

Deena

I never thought in my wildest dreams that I would tell anybody in this house to stop tanning... that's when you know the world is coming to an end.

Snooki

So it peeled and then I exfoliated and then I burnt that part that peeled ... Pauly D problems.

Pauly D

I got no tan in Italy so I got a little excited, I went tanning in Jersey, went tanning went tanning went tanning ... I burnt my whole f--kin' face off.

Pauly D

Pauly D: We're going to get mani-pedis.
Vinny: You know, guy stuff.

Displaying quotes 97 - 108 of 912 in total

Jersey Shore Quotes

Pauly D: Yo, if she still has coloring books ... she's too young for you, man.
Vinny: If she's got a basket on her bicycle ... she's too young for you man.
Pauly D: If she still has the parental controls on her TV ... she's too young for you bro.
Vinny: If she only owns Snow White on DVD ... she's too young for you man.
Pauly D: If his Keds still light up ... he's too young for you bro.
Ronnie: [laughs]
Pauly D: If she still plays laser tag ... she's too young for you bro.
JWoww: That's me.

It's like putting a watermelon into a pinhole.

Snooki