Climax together, that’s as rare as Haley’s Comet.


William: Well then their faces when I explained the nuts and bolts, the wife looked like she’d seen the second coming.
Virginia: Wait till she sees her husband coming.

If you want a family, forget the good book, follow my ten commands.


You’re joking, they actually thought sleeping together meant actually sleeping.


I'm sorry about last night, I was punishing someone and it ended up being you.


Well good for you, for taking care of yourself, recognizing your limits.


Once you've seen Oz, who wants to go back to Kansas?


Virginia: What a heartbreaker you are Dr. Haas.
Ethan: Don't you have that backwards?

In 4 months, we're going to have another visitor who needs everything done for him. Maybe we should look at this time with your mother as a dress rehearsal.


I am not paying you to babysit your own kids George Johnson!


I don't believe in shadows. I believe in the light of scientific inquiry.

The world isn't kind to mavericks Bill, you want to lead an unconventional life, you gotta learn to hide in plain sight.

Barton Scully