In order for your soul to be compromised, you need to have one.


April: I thought I was the only one freaking out over Lucy's little love life.
Marc: I'm not freaking out, I'm jealous!

I swear I felt a connection between us! I wouldn't have kissed you otherwise.


I'm with Joss. Honesty is always the best policy.


You're a sex therapist, Karen. Get on board of that party train!


I can't hear the name Paul without having PTSD. Or Daniel... or Richard, for that matter.


Joss: Anyone want to join? It will change your life.
Karen: Yeah, I don't really feel like getting kicked in the ribs.

You will have this orgasm if it’s the last thing I do.


Kate: Do I have to get out of my snuggie?
Harry: Is that what that is?

I’m gonna pretty much do everything I can to not think about Brian, except for when I’m cyberstalking him.


Henry: Bad news?
Joss: No, it’s just the slow crumbling of my self-esteem.

Patient: I’ve never had an orgasm!
Karen: Okay. Little bit of a problem.

Mistresses Quotes

Customer: Is this the sexy sheet section?
April: This is the satin section. What's sexy to one person is a slippery elbow in the face to someone else.

Savi: Where's your wedding ring?
Harry: It's in my pocket.
Savi: Put it on.