NCIS
Mondays 9:00 PM on CBSPopular NCIS Quotes
Tony: Well hey there Alfredo. Looks like you traded in your prison jumpsuit, huh?
Bishop: NCIS! Don't move!
Alfredo: Go ahead. Kill me. Get it over with!
Bishop: Why would we do that?
Tony: Alfredo. We're NCIS.
Alfredo: So, like feds can't be bought?
Tony: That's not really our style.
Alfredo: You're not going to kill me?
McGee: Gorney, need a towel or a fan over there?
Ned: You try navigating this gauntlet, Timmy boy. Feels like I just spent hours running through catacombs to kill a dragon-priest only to step outside and have another dragon riding right on my tail.
McGee: It's an obscure Skyrim reference boss that actually makes perfect sense.
Gibbs: Thank you elf-lord. What did you find, dragon-priest?
Berk: Got any daughters, Director Vance?
Vance: I do. I have one.
Berk: I have three. If any one of them grows up to be like Ensign Wilt, I'll be one proud papa. Just a special kid, in every way.
Vance: A kid with a very heady position at ONI, Captain.
Berk: She earned it. Smart, squared away. Had a knack for computer analysis and code-breaking like I've never see
If it isn't Jake the snake, who takes the cake, never wakes and bakes and.....I haven't had my coffee yet.
Tony
Rousseau: You ask about the United States. You ask the wrong questions.
McGee: Then why don't you set me straight.
Rousseau: When you plan a big party, there are many details to discuss over many lines. It is impossible to keep them secret. You left the party to be with me today, no? I'm sorry you're missing our contribution to the fun.
McGee: Guard! I need a phone!
Gibbs: Did you write that?
Luke: Yes!
Gibbs: You want to finish it before I show it to them?
Luke: Who?
Gibbs: Your parents. What's wrong? It's for them, isn't it? You did everything you're supposed to. Disowned everyone who isn't the calling? It's what Samar wants, right?
Luke: Please don't show it to them.
Gibbs: Oh no, it's already been decided.
Luke: Don't....DON'T!
Gibbs: Hey! You said you wanted to die. What would your parents think if they heard that? You broke their hearts.
Luke: The kids at school hate me. They kept telling me to go back to Iraq. I don't know what to do anymore.
Gibbs: You talk to me. Where is Samar?
Luke: If I tell you what I know, will you take me to see my parents?
Gibbs: Yeah.
When babies are used in the wars of men, may God help us all.
Bayar
Bayar: I'll help you, but your efforts are wasted. I would have helped you without payment or without blackmail.
Bishop: Why?
Bayar: Women and children first. It's an absolute we can always agree upon.
Tony: Gibbs is tied up.
Bayar: What do you think?
Tony: What do you mean what does she think? Gibbs is tied up, he sent us.
Bayar: I heard you, but I didn't like your answer.
Tony: You don't like my answer or you don't like me?
Bayar: Neither.
Bishop: Gibbs really is tied up. He sends his apologies.
Bayar: You see? She dips it in sugar and all of a sudden it tastes so sweet.
Bishop: Mr. Bayar...
Bayar: Please. Call me Agah.
Bishop: Agah. We'd like to discuss your mother.
Vance: Blackmail Bayar to help us, DIA is none the wiser. That's the plan?
Gibbs: Yeah. You got a better one, Leon?
Vance: Word of advice, don't get caught.
Gibbs: I had a daughter. She used to to sit right there at the table where you were. She took my pocket knife from me once. Knife wasn't a toy and she knew that. She climbed up here. And she took that knife and she carved her initials right in the back of that cabinet there. And lost the best pocket knife that I ever had.
Luke: What'd you do?
Gibbs: I scolded her. Grounded her. Then I forgave her.
Luke: I'm nothing. I'm nothing! Everyone hates me! Just kill me! That's what they want! That's what I want!
Vance: So, what are you gonna tell her? (Gibbs turns to face him) Lee a hero or a villain?
Gibbs: Both.
