Orange is the New Black
Fridays 8:00 PM on NetflixOrange is the New Black Quotes
Stratman: This isn't B.O. You've doused yourself in something evil. Is this some kind of game?
Blanca: Jenga is a game. This is civil disobedience.
Alex: We could both probably use, like, a week where we don't do something pathetic and/or morally incriminating.
Piper: Where your first thought in the morning isn't, "I have defiled myself in the eyes of God and man."
Pennsatucky: What if he's just like a regular person who made a mistake? Right? I mean, come on, we both know I'm not innocent.
Big Boo: Yeah, but you never -- Okay, you did...shoot a human being with a hunting rifle. But she had it coming.
Pennsatucky: No, she didn't.
Pennsatucky: Boo, I am so tired of walking around feeling sh*tty every day.
Big Boo: Fine, but guess what? He gets to feel sh*tty for the rest of his natural life. Oh, and beyond, when he's a tandoori skewer in hell.
Digori: That's how they get you. With words. They put ideas in the words that make you start thinking.
Skinhead Helen: I never thought about it that way.
Digori: Yeah. Well, then, all of a sudden you're like, "What if other people are having these experiences that are different than mine, but still totally legit? And what if I'm supposed to think about that before I start judging their lives?"
Skinhead Helen: We could all stand to learn stuff, I guess.
Alaina: C'mon. They're gonna send some volunteer college derp with a straight part who's gonna get all "Dangerous Minds" when it turns out you can't read.
I don't want anyone stickin' anything in my brain I didn't give say-so for.
Digori
You know, if you're gonna poop in the shower, at least you could plan ahead. Like, do it in a shower cap, and take it with you after. Just common decency.
Lorna [to Angela]
Piper: Do you know what I want? A burger...from Shake Shack.
Alex: I legit just, like, teared up a little bit.
This food looks like something a walrus would regurgitate to feed it's least favorite baby.
Alex
Pidge: You just gonna bend like that?
Ruiz: We got power now. We can't be petty and sh*t.
When God gives you a swastika, he opens a window. And then you remember, there is no God.
Red
