Thursdays 8:30 PM on NBC
Parks-and-recreation

Tom: Does Pawnee Cable Access even have hair and makeup?
Leslie: Well, they have a communal lipstick in a box of combs.

Leslie: You're never going to believe who I got. People are going to freak out.
Tom: Rihanna.
Leslie: No.
Tom: Dr. Oz.
Leslie: Nope, you're never going to ask.
Tom: Justin Bieber.
Leslie: No. Ex-Indiana Pacer. Small forward Detlef Schrempf.
Tom: THE Detlef Schrempf?

I can't make it to the telethon tonight because I have no interest in being there.

Tom

Leslie: Can you get five eagles? No, get 10 eagles!
Mark: Leslie-
Leslie: No, you're right. It's your life. Give her as many eagles as you want.

Horseback. You should ask her on horseback. No, you should ask her in a hot air balloon. No, she should be on a hot air balloon and you should ride up on horseback. Oh, wait. She's in the balloon; you ride up on horseback. You point to the sky. Up there, skywriting. Marry me, Ann.

Leslie

Jerry: No, Leslie. Please. Tonight's kind of a big night. You know, all my kids are away...
Tom: Gross! No! That's Jerry's sex night. That ruins sex and tonight.

And it's important because Pawnee is the fourth fattest town in the U.S. It goes us, Dallas, Tulsa and certain parts of the Mall of America.

Leslie

I wish he had tiny puppy shoes. I would totally shine his little shoes for free. I do say the cutest stuff.

Andy
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