Scrubs Season 4 Episode 21: "My Lips Are Sealed" Quotes
J.D.: Ted, you should probably sit down. You're looking a little purple.
Ted: I know my own body.
He collapses.
Turk: Calm down, I just want to see if you got anywhere with Carla.
J.D.'s Narration: Alright, he knows your lying face, but silence is incriminating too. So think. What's between silence and talking?
J.D.: Hmgnphitldj!
J.D.: Ted, what are you doing?
Ted: I like to do stomach crunches after lunch.
J.D.: Ted, lunch was four hours ago.
Ted: Yep, I wasted most of my Tuesday.
J.D.: It's Wednesday.
Ted: Aw, man! I missed the Gilmore Girls!
J.D.: It was just a friend kiss!
Carla: Were your lips parted at all?
J.D.: No, I pursed them like this.
Carla: I don't know, J.D. I remember my one lip being on top of your upper lip and my other lip being somewhere in the middle of yours, which means your lips were apart and I don't think that's a friend kiss.
There's nothing like the rays of the morning sun kissing you awake and gently reminding you that you got drunk and kissed your best friend's wife!
J.D.'s Narration
Carla: Good night.
J.D.: Good night.
Carla: Buenas noches.
J.D.: Buenas... those things.
Elliot: You're coming in because you need to set an example of professionalism and you're certainly not going to do that by making fun of that man's slinky-doo.
Dr. Kelso: Don't pull me, I'm your boss for God's-
Girl: Giant Man, why are you making that noise?
Janitor: Oh. Well, cause my camera doesn't make a real sound, and it's more fun that way. See, here you go. Look happy. Look sad. Look crazy. Look like you're going away.
Dad: Look at my girl. Right back up on the monkey bars, even after she chipped her tooth there last week.
Dr. Cox: That's nothing. My kid's got a forehead full of stitches from leaping off the jungle gym.
Carla: J.D., I know what you're trying to do and it's very sweet, but the last couple of days have been so messed up and confusing, I'd love to just try and forget about it and have a few drinks, okay?
J.D.: But I told Turk I'd talk about him constantly until you made me leave.
Intern: That guy needs to do some serious thinking about baseball.
Todd: He wouldn't even let me see it.
Elliot: Hey meathead! Oh good, you both looked. Now, Mr. Gerst came here for help, and we're doctors, so how about we try and treat him with at least a little bit of dignity and respect, okay?
Dr. Kelso: That man is a human sundial!
Dr. Cox: Jack just- He just fell off of the jungle gym.
Jordan: You're not careful enough with him!
Dr. Cox: What about the time you had him and he brained himself on the coffee table?
Jordan: That was an accident.
