You shut up, it's summer!

Fiona

• Permalink: You shut up, it's summer!
• Added: January 11, 2015

V: I wanted him to fail. I thought he'd be overwhelmed.
Fiona: And?
V: Jackass is a better mom than me.

• Permalink: Jackass is a better mom than me.
• Added: January 11, 2015

After extensive research and weeks of testing, I have determined my liver can support one beer a day. I am now a cheap date. Buzzed already, like an anemic ten year old girl.

Frank

• Permalink: After extensive research and weeks of testing, I have determined my liver can support one...
• Added: January 11, 2015

Uh, hello. Um, hi. Um, I know that you're acting out your father issues by dyeing your hair with that trashy peroxide and dry humping that man on my couch, but I don't think it's nice to expose your child to this behavior.

Sheila [to Sami]

• Permalink: Uh, hello. Um, hi. Um, I know that you're acting out your father issues by dyeing your hair...
• Added: January 11, 2015

Sheila: How are your headaches?
Frank: You can't feel a persons headache by touching his head.

• Permalink: You can't feel a persons headache by touching his head.
• Added: January 11, 2015

V: I'm done. The milk bar is closed. We can go to formula.
Kev: No, no, no, no. Absolutely not. We are not doing formula. They will grow up with asthma and be short and have no friends.

• Permalink: No, no, no, no. Absolutely not. We are not doing formula. They will grow up with asthma and...
• Added: January 11, 2015