So, my parents are, like, fighting all the time, and they want me to choose sides. But I can't, because they're both idiots.

Donna

(Eric and Laurie are fighting at dinner)
Hyde: Could we please not fight?
Laurie (imitating Hyde): Could we please not fight?
Eric (to Hyde): Could you please not suck?

Eric: Didn't you just, like, flunk out of college?
Laurie: Get bent, twerp.
Eric: Wear a bra!

Donna: This whole divorce thing could actually work to my advantage.
Jackie: Exactly!
Donna: Yeah... I just have to make it very clear that my love is contingent on how much they buy me!
Jackie: Why am I even talking to you about this? You have a great handle on it.

Give me a break, Forman. I don't have a mommy.

Hyde

Kelso: You know, Hyde, seeing you work hard and take pride in what you do... I lost a lot of respect for you, man.
Fez: You used to be my hero. My lazy American hero.

Donna: Excuse me, Jackie, when exactly did you lose your soul?
Jackie: Um, cheerleading camp.

You're like the brother I never had. I mean, I have a sister, but I hate her, so this is great!

</i>

(on Hyde's history paper)
Laurie: Oh yeah, what'd you get? A D?
Hyde: No. A C minus. (Red and Kitty cheer)
Eric: I got a B.
Red: You couldn't get an A?

Eric: Hey, Dad. Can I talk to you for a sec? Do you think that Hyde can stay for dinner?
Red: Eric, again? I can't afford to feed your friend. I can't even afford to feed you, but the law requires me to!

(Hyde throws his phone at the wall when he sees Eric)
Hyde: Hey Forman.
Eric: Hi.
Hyde: Come on in. make yourself at home. I'm out of beer, but if you want you could break something.
Eric: Actually, I had my eye on the phone, so...

Red: Pork chops? I thought we agreed do stick to a budget! Pork chops aren't cheap!
Kitty: Well, you know, on the way to the market, I tried to run over a cat. But they are just so darn speedy!

That 70's Show Quotes

You're like the brother I never had. I mean, I have a sister, but I hate her, so this is great!

</i>

Eric: If my dad catches me copping beers he'll kill me.
Hyde: I'm willing to take that risk.