The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSPopular The Big Bang Theory Quotes
Amy: If it makes you feel any better, the only person who signed my yearbook was my mother.
Leonard: Aww.
Amy: "Dear, Amy. Self-respect and a hymen are better than friends and fun. Love, Mom."
Raj: Aren't you gonna to eat lunch?
Howard: Nah, I blew my food allowance on Pokemon cards?
Howard: You're full of estrogen and you don't act like that.
Bernadette: That's 'cause I'm a woman. I've had years of practice riding the dragon.
Sheldon: I spoke with Leonard's mother, and she made me feel better.
Leonard: I don't know who you talked to, but that wasn't my mother.
Well, isn't this nice? Sometimes the baby wins.
Sheldon
Mrs. Cooper, hi, it's Penny. I think I broke your son.
Penny
Mother, she's an atheist, not a vampire.
Sheldon
Penny: Who's the murderer?
Raj: Any question but that.
Penny: Sorry ... hey, who's not the murderer?
Kripke: My work would suffer too if I was getting laid all the time.
Sheldon: Yes. That is the reason. My work is suffering because of all the laid I am getting.
Kripke: You lucky bastard.
Sheldon: What can I say, you know? She enjoys my genitals. I am giving them to her on a nightly basis.
Sheldon: Leonard?
Leonard: What?
Sheldon: I still can't sleep.
That offer is only good until the third trimester. I can't risk getting amniotic fluid on my spot.
Sheldon
Howard: What were they thinking putting Doctor Octopus's mind in Spider-Man's body?
Raj: Well, I've been quite enjoying that. It combines all the superhero fun of Spider-Man with all the body-switching shenanigans of Freaky Friday. Both versions: original and Lohan.
Howard (imitating Raj): "Both versions: original and Lohan."
