The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSThe Big Bang Theory Quotes
Can't you surprise him in some other way? For example, I bet he'd be delightfully taken aback if you cleaned your apartment.
Sheldon
While I appreciate the "oh, snap," I'm uncomfortable having your moist breath in my ear.
Sheldon [to Raj]
If I hadn't gone into microbiology, I would have gone into physics. Or ice dancing.
Bernadette
Sheldon: Why are you crying?
Penny: Because I'm stupid!
Sheldon: Well that's no reason to cry; one cries because one is sad. For example, I cry because others are stupid and it makes me sad.
Sheldon: Where's your notebook?
Penny: I don't have one.
Sheldon: How are you gonna take notes without a notebook?
Penny: I have to take notes?
Sheldon: How else are you gonna study for the tests?
Penny: There's gonna be a test?
Sheldon: Tests. Here, it's college ruled, I hope that's not too intimidating.
Leonard: The more the merrier.
Sheldon: That's a false equivalency, more does not equal merry. If there were two thousand people in this apartment, would we be celebrating? No, we'd be suffocating.
Sheldon, you remind me of a young Lex Luthor.
Raj
You can't sink, with all that helium in you you'll float away.
Raj [to Sheldon]
We represent the lollipop gang and we want you.
Raj [to Sheldon]
Wolowitz: In romance, like show business, always leave them wanting more.
Leonard: What does that mean?
Penny: He struck out.
Wow. It's like the Ganges on laundry day.
Raj
I never admit defeat. However, on an unrelated topic, I'm never getting out of this bed again.
Sheldon
