The Office

The Office "Murder" Quotes (Page 2)

Michael: Tube city. You owe me one.
Jim: [interview] Co-managing is a give and take. You have to pick your battles. One of the battles I picked was Michael's idea of running plastic tubes all over the office with hamsters inside of them. He called it Tube City. So, yes, I do owe him one.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jim: Okay, we need to do something. People are freaking out wondering what's going to happen.
Michael: You're right. They need something. A distraction. Anything new on YouTube? Doesn't have to be good.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Kevin: Michael, did you just throw up in here?
Michael: Nah. Just poopin'. You know how I be.
Kevin: It smells like throw-up in here.
Michael: Crazy world. Lot of smells.
 • Rating: 4.9 / 5.0

Dwight: You can all have jobs at Schrute Farms as human scarecrows. Although it doesn't pay much, and you can't unionize.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Dwight: [reading email] I'm sure you've seen the item in the Journal. I just want to stress that it's all conjecture, if we have any concrete information, you will know ASAP.
Michael: Erin, do we have the journal?
Erin: Your feelings journal? You told me to put it in the time capsule.
Michael: Did you?
Pam: He means the Wall Street Journal, online.
Michael. Oh, the Wall.
 • Rating: 3.7 / 5.0

Dwight: Michael, what is the meaning of this email that everyone got?
Michael: You'll have to be more specific, Dwight. I get like eight emails today.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Jim: Once a year Dwight holds a seminar for us on karate. Because one thing we know that thousand-year-old martial arts do each year is ... change.
 • Rating: 4.1 / 5.0

Dwight: You cannot go wrong with a throat punch.
 • Rating: 3.7 / 5.0

Dwight: Somebody attack me. Kevin, Go!
Kevin: No WAY. Last time, you pulled my pants down and then you tried to choke me with my shoelace.
Dwight: False. I DID choke you with your shoelace.
 • Rating: 3.7 / 5.0

Jim: In everyone's defense I think the most worthy opponent of you is ... you.
Dwight: That is correct. Unless there happen to be measles present.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

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