The Simpsons

The Simpsons "Bart the Lover" Quotes

(Homer tries helping the family write a letter to Mrs. Krabappel from Woodrow, informing her that he is leaving town.)
Homer: Three simple words: I, Am, Gay.
Marge: Homer, for the last time, I'm not putting that in!
 • Rating: Unrated

"Woodrow": Dearest Edna, I must leave you. Why, I cannot say. Where, you cannot know. How I will get there, I haven't decided yet. But one thing I can tell you, any time I hear the wind blow it will whisper the name Edna. And so let us part with a love that will echo through the ages. ---Woodrow
 • Rating: Unrated

Bart: Gross, he's picking his nose!
 • Rating: Unrated

Edna: One scratch-n-win, Apu.
Apu: Mrs. Krabappel, I haven't seen you since we doubled our prices. Still teaching?
Edna: Let's see. scratches lottery ticket One more day, at least.
 • Rating: Unrated

Mechanic: Bingo bango, sugar in the gas tank. The ex-husband strikes again.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Todd: Ow! My Eyeball!
 • Rating: Unrated

Skinner: (trying to get attention of school) People.... people. You know I can wait just as long as you. (fails) KNOCK IT OFF!
 • Rating: Unrated

Edna: After two months at sea, the pilgrims were running out of food and water. Yes, Nelson?
Nelson: Did they have any yo-yo's?
Edna: No, they did not have yo-yo's. When they landed at Plymouth Rock, they were greeted by the friendly Indians.
Milhouse: Did the Indians have yo-yo's!?
Edna: No they did not have yo-yo's! That's it! I am sick and tired of talking about yo-yo's. From now on I won't accept any book report, science project, dioramas, or anything else on yo-yo's, or yo-yo related topics. Am I making myself clear?
Bart: Yo!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jasper: What's eatin' you, woman? Your personal ad said you wanted a man. Well, you got yourself a humdinger!
Edna: I don't know. I guess I expected something different from your photo.
Jasper: Don't let my age fool you. Just 'cause it's a little slow on the roof. I've forgotten how the rest of that goes.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Don't worry; I just drew up a little blueprint. Now, let me walk you through it. This is the door, he goes through that. This is the roof, this happy character is the sun, he shines down on the house, see?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Are we missing your favorite quote from "Bart the Lover?" Submit it here and get points for adding quotes!