The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXThe Simpsons Season 18 Episode 16: "Homerazzi" Quotes
Homer: Look at those celebrities, I've met them all, and yet they don't acknowledge my existence.
Betty White: Hello Homer, have you lost weight?
Homer: Oh like you care Betty White.
Betty White: Tell me, how's Maggie?
Homer: Her name is Marge!
Betty White: I was talking about your baby.
Homer: Oh, uh, she's looking very (Snaps picture) SNAPPY!
Betty White: Thanks for taking my picture. If you want me to sign it, here's a stamped self-addressed envelope, and give Santa's Little Helper a big hug for me.
Homer: (shakes fist) Yeah, that's right, just walk away.
What's with technology today? I-Pod, I-Tunes, I give up!
Krusty Doll
Krusty Doll: Where do kids today get these band names? The Kinks? The Stones? Sounds like my last physical!
Bart: Ha ha, references.
(sadly) Oh Captain Janeway! Your mission ended too soon!
(About the album) It was like a resume to a man.
Marge
Homer: Aw, our kids use to be so cute.
Bart: Used to?
Homer: Oh, deal with it!
I don't need to make a wish, because I already have this wonderful family . . . I wish for infinity hamburgers.
</i> Homer
Do you know how many fires are started by birthday candles? If you do, tell me. It would settle a bet down at the station house. I say five, Gus says a million.
Firefighter
Dad, you're out of shape even for an American.
Lisa
(slowly) How do you want your comeuppance? 8x10, or wallet size!?
Waitress: Stem cell fajita?
Rainer: Leave the tray.
Can't I even have privacy here!?
(Camera pans to Homer showering under a fire hydrant.)