The Simpsons

The Simpsons "Rosebud" Quotes (Page 3)

Marge: What are you doing?
Homer: I'm writing a delicious send-up of Mr. Burns for his birthday party. Is poo-poo one word or two?
Homer: Now, I'm not saying Mr. Burns is incontinent...
Bart: Incontinent! (laughs) Too rich!
Lisa: Does either of you know what incontinent means?
Homer: Lisa, don't spoil our fun.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Bart: (Pulls Bobo out of the bag of ice.) Hey, it's a teddy bear. Gross, it's probably diseased or something. Here, Maggie.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Maggie, I'm trying to watch TV. Put that moldy old bear down. (Gasps) Moldy? Old? I'm gonna get something to eat!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Homer: Who needs his money? We're getting by okay.
(Grampa crashes a Ute through the Simpsons' wall.)
Grampa: Son, you gotta help me! I hit three people on the way over here, and I don't have any insurance! (Pause) So, how's my Ute?
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: My life can't get any worse.
Smithers: Homer Simpson, report for "much worse" duty.
Homer: D'oh!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Barney the dinosaur: Two plus two is four, two plus two is four, two plus two is four, two plus two is four...
Homer: (chuckling) I can see why this is so popular.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Mr. Burns: Smithers, I'm so happy. Something amazing has happened, I'm actually happy. Take a note! From now on, I'm only going to be good and kind to everyone.
Smithers: I'm sorry sir, I don't have a pencil.
Mr. Burns: Oh, don't worry, I'm sure I'll remember it.
 • Rating: Unrated

Homer: Well, we didn't get any money, but Mr. Burns got what he wanted. Marge, I'm confused. Is this a happy ending or a sad ending?
Marge: It's an ending, that's enough.
 • Rating: Unrated

Smithers: I have some sad news to report. A small puppy, not unlike Lassie, was just run over in the parking lot.
(Audience gasps)
Smithers: And now it's time for the comedy stylings of Homer Simpson!
Homer: Are you ready to laugh?
Man: That poor dog.
 • Rating: Unrated

Mr. Burns: Ah, yes. Naturally, I can't pay you much of a reward because I'm strapped for cash.
(The ceiling above gives way; money and jewels pour down on him.)
Mr. Burns: As you can see, this old place is falling apart. But I'm sure we can come to an understanding.
 • Rating: Unrated

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