The Simpsons Season 3 Quotes
Homer: Herb, this is the stupidest thing I've ever seen. I can't believe we blew 2,000 bucks on it when right now rollers could be kneading my buttocks.
Herb: Homer, could you stop thinking about your ass?!
Homer: I tried, but I can't.
Why did this have to happen now during prime time, when TV's brightest stars come out to shine?Homer
I used to be rich. I owned Mickey Mouse massage parlors and those Disney sleaze balls shut me down. I said "Look, I'll change the logo, put Mickey's pants back on." Some guys you just can't reason with.Hobo
Lisa: Why didn't you write Unckie Herb?
Herb: Hey, if I wrote to you what was I suppose to say? "Dear Lisa, last night I used a rat for a pillow thanks to your pop?"
Except for huge gaps in the western states, "Hands Across America" was a complete success.TV Announcer
Herb: Lady, you just gave me the idea of a lifetime! How do I thank you?
Woman: Please don't hurt me.
Herb: Consider it done.
(On his back, holding Maggie up) The pitch is insufficient for "burp me", and this jigsaw motion is something I've never(Maggie throws up on him) Eureka.Herb
Will I pass my English test? .... Outlook not so good. Wow, it does work.Bart
Samantha: How do we know when we fall in love?
Kraboppel: Oh, don't you worry. Most of you will never fall in love and marry out of fear of dying alone.
We just moved here from Phoenix. My dad owns a home security company. He came to Springfield because of its high crime rate and lackluster police force.Samantha
How could this happen? We started out like Romeo and Juliet but it ended up in tragedy!Milhouse
Milhouse: Uh, that's a nice dress.
Samantha: My dad makes me wear it, I hate it!
Milhouse: Well I hate it too!