Wednesdays 10:00 PM on FX
Wilfred

Bear! Don't live! I can't go on without you being dead!

I'm a complete failure. My father was right about me when he looked me in the eye and said [starts panting].

Classic Margo...couldn't hear death if it was knocking on her door.

I couldn't have said it better myself...because I can't say things, because I'm a dog.

I'm gonna do that through training, discipline, and searching "hero dog" to see what that even means.

The home security system to a dog is like the cotton gin to a slave. It's an insult. It says you're easily replaceable.

Do you know what she said to me? Why don't you find a real crime to solve, McGruff? And you wonder where he gets it from.

Oh Phyllis, your kisses taste so sweet, and your paws smell like corn chips.

Ryan, no door can stay in the way of love. Unless it's like, a door door. Does it have a door knob?

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