While at Stella's house in New Jersey, Ted tries to sell the gang on just how great New Jersey, despite the fact he, like all New Yorkers, has always hated Jersey. However, when he realizes Stella wants him to move to Jersey and she's not moving to New York, Ted quickly changes his opinion.... that is until he reads a bedtime story to Stella's daughter and can see himself in Jersey. Good news is so could Marshall.
Meanwhile, Robin thinks she got a job as a national anchor and quits her crappy Metro News job. However, when she finds out it was just an interview amongst 20 other people and she doesn't get her job back, she has to make it back to Metro News from Jersey... in only 30 minutes! However, at the end of the episode we get a bomb dropped on us... Robin is moving to Japan.
Meanwhile, Barney, clearly out of his element in NJ, spends the episode trying to get a knuckle tap. We've seen far better episodes out of Barney, but what do you expect when you stick this man in a basement?
Marshall: I hate New York! I'm sorry, but it's true! Today, I was walking around PriceCo. Have you been there? It's huge! All the stores in New York are so cramped! Every time I turn around I knock something over. I'm like some huge monster that came out of the oceans to destroy bodegas! ...I'm too big for New York, okay! I'm always trying to fit into cramped little subway seats, or duck under doorways that were built a hundred and fifty years ago. "Hey, people are bigger now! Build bigger doorways! What the hell is wrong with you?" ...And it's so loud. All the time. Yes, I know it's the city that never sleeps, but guess what? I like to sleep! I've been tired for eight years! Tired and scared, with black and blue marks on my elbows from trying to fit into all these tiny elf doorways! New Jersey's great! It's got huge stores, and lawns, and you never have to carry a cup again! For the rest of your life! I'm not afraid to say it: I love New Jersey! [sees Lily's face] I'm just kidding
- Permalink: I love New Jersey! I'm just kidding
Lily: Ted, if you murder me and bury me in New Jersey, I'll hunt you forever.
Ted: But if I murder you and bury somewhere else?
Lily: Hey, I'll leave you alone. I'm sure you had your reasons
- Permalink: Ted, if you murder me and bury me in New Jersey, I'll hunt you f...