Melrose Place

Did Heather Locklear's return to Melrose Place live up to the hype?

Are Riley and Jonah the most boring couple on television?

Just how hot was the Auggie/Violet sex scene?

Our staff answers those questions and more in this edition of the Melrose Place Round Table. We encourage reader feedback on all the topics below...

Grade the return of Amanda Woodward.
M.L. House: N/A. This is like grading the President after 100 days in office. Sure, Amanda delivered the occasional bitchy line and it was great. But until we see where the show is going with her character, it's too early to judge.

Dr. Shepherd: A. This is Melrose Place. Like Gossip Girl, when it loses its edge, its other flaws are hard to ignore. What is a prime time CW soap when its plot lines and characters are boring (see question #2 below)? Enter Heather Locklear. She actually lived up to the hype and Amanda's whirlwind, take-no-prisoners return gave the show a shot in the arm last night.

The Barnacle: C. As in: I was happy to see her on the show again!

Riley and Jonah: sweet and loving? Or lame and boring?
M.L. House: It is possible to make viewers interested in a a dedicated, loyal couple. Just look at Eric and Tami on Friday Night Lights. But that requires great acting and solid storytelling. Seeing as Melrose Place showcases neither of these elements, we really need Riley and Jonah to break up, make a sex tape or do something interesting. Soon.

Dr. Shepherd: They're certainly both, and that's an issue. The show needs a (small) moral compass, yes, but what happened to the tension between these two that has been building for weeks? It wasn't present at all last night, just one week removed from when things started to get interesting with Ella blatantly coming on to Jonah.

The Barnacle: Zzzzz. Riles, get off your high horse. It's modeling. Everything's superficial, even bios.

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When I hired you to give this place a makeover, I didn't mean smear it with lipstick and turn it into a five-dollar hooker.

With those words, followed by the firing of Caleb, Amanda Woodward returned to Melrose Place this week.

To the show's credit, she fit right in, as The CW had clearly been hoping all along that Heather Locklear would be unable to resist the allure of bad dialogue, cleavage-baring dresses and sex-driven intrigue.

As "Caheunga," proved Amanda hasn't lost her ability to manipulate, cajole or look beautiful. But the episode also concluded with a hint that this vixen's life is not nearly as perfect as it seems.

We've updated our Melrose Place music section with singles from this episode.

Not since Bruce Willis in The Sixth Sense has a dead person continued to affect so many lives, long after his/her passing. Sydney didn't just leave a mysterious note for Amanda this week, she also drove Auggie to nearly fall off the wagon. Instead, he was stuck with an even worse fate: a sex scene with Ashlee Simpson's Violet.

While we know what the future holds for those two characters, it's uncertain where the show is going with Lauren and David. She truly does seem to bring the romantic side out of this hustler, but can she reveal to him her secret life as a call girl?

Not yet. Good call there, Lauren.

Riley and Jonah continue to bring the show down, however. It doesn't help that their storylines don't always make sense. Wouldn't Riley have signed a contract stating her $10,000 salary prior to her photo shoot? There's no legal way this payment can be withheld because she refused to go along with a lie weeks after the deal.

Also, what happened to Jenna Dewan's Kendra? Didn't Jonah tell Riley he was gonna continue to work with her? She was hot and she offered the possibility of an actual affair, something dirty the show's boring couple needs in order to make us care about them.

Overall, this was a solid showcase for Amanda and we have high hopes for her future on the show. Do you agree? Were you giddy to see TV's biggest bitch back where she belongs?

Check out a few of our favorite Melrose Place quotes from the hour:

Riley: I am burning all of these.
Jonah: Recycle. It's better for the environment. | permalink

Lauren: We can wait until after dinner to have you arrested. | permalink

Riley: The worst thing would be letting your life pass you on and seeing it take your soulmate with you. | permalink

Auggie: I'm not a murderer. I didn't kill Sydney. | permalink

Riley: This whole night is just one big superficial fantasy. | permalink

In case you haven't been online or watching any TV over the last few weeks, this just in:

Heather Locklear is returning to Melrose Place! The actress reprises her iconic role of Amanda Woodward on Tuesday night's episode. We'll cover the installment in full, as always.

Leading up to her (re)debut, Locklear spoke to Zap2It about a number of show-related topics. Excerpts from the interview follow...

On the use of original series regulars: I ran into Laura [Leighton, who plays Sydney] at my first table read for this, and we hugged for so long, It was also nice to see Thomas [Calabro] and for us to have our own little group. Then it really did feel like Melrose Place to me.

On first impressions of the show: When I saw the pilot episode, I thought, "Ooohh, this is slick!'' Like they had said, it wasn't the old "Melrose Place.'' Then I saw episode two, which I really loved.

On the new Amanda: [Producers] said she didn't want to be on an island any more, and she's ready for action. She's now got a boyfriend who has a lot of money, and something's going down with her company, so she has to come back and fix it.

When we heard that Ashlee Simpson-Wentz had been fired from Melrose Place, it was music to our ears.

Unfortunately, before she leaves, there will be painful images for our eyes.

Colin Egglesfield, who plays Auggie and who also got the boot, told E! News yesterday that his character and that of Simpson-Wentz will get hot and heavy before they depart the show in early 2010.

"There are very few clothes involved in the near future," the actor said, while an insider added that Auggie and Violet are involved in a pair of steamy sex scenes in the near future.

This does not mean, however, that Violet and Auggie will leave the show together, hand-in-hand, in a healthy relationship.

Egglesfield said his character is headed down a dark path, as teased via instant message last episode.

"Things get pretty violent and kind of crazy. Auggie ends up hitting the bottle and falls off the deep end a little bit," he said.

As long as he's not wearing a shirt while doing so, female viewers will likely be satisfied.

As Melrose Place has teased in ads over the last couple weeks: Amanda's back... better watch yours!

But enough with the hype and the commercials. Fans want to actually see Heather Locklear back in (bitchy) action. They'll get the chance this Tuesday, on the episode titled "Caheunga."

As Caleb orders Ella to attend an event, and Ella responds by insulting WPK's New York office, guess who walks in the door. Watch and see what happens:

Previously reported Melrose Place spoilers have stated that the show will focus heavily on Amanda over the next few months. We can't wait.

With one more week to go until the debut of Heather Locklear, Melrose Place aired an episode that focused a lot on relationships.

There was Violet and Michael; Violet and Auggie; Jonah and Riley; Jonah and Ella; Lauren and David.

What went down with each of these characters? Our staff has gathered to discuss them in another edition of the Melrose Place Round Table. As always, we encourage reader feedback on the questions, answers and topics below...

Will we ever see Auggie again?
M.L. House: Riley. Yes, he has to return to get his pink slip... errr, I mean answer his arrest warrant. Even if he's innocent, he could get in major trouble running from the law.

Dr. Shepherd: I'm worried we may not. Someone needs to organize a search party ASAP. I nominate Violet. We just got a tip that he may be hiding from the cops in a secret city at the bottom of the ocean. The only way to get there is to charter a boat 10 miles due west of L.A., strap cinderblocks to your feet and jump into the abyss.

The Barnacle: Wait, Auggie didn't appear on the episode last night?!? Perhaps the fact that I didn't notice says a lot about his impact on the show.

Jonah: A loyal fiance, or a total moron?
M.L. House: Can't it be both?!? Sure, Jonah showed respect for Riley by now not sticking his lens inside Ella (if you know what I mean!), but that also made him a moron for not... sticking his lens inside Ella (if you know what I mean!).

Dr. Shepherd: The puzzling thing is that he will get on his high horse after clearly enjoying his lunchtime role play experience, and having kissed cute director girl like two days ago. If you wanna stay with Riles, fine, but don't act like you're Mr. Loyal, Jonah. On a side note, are you insane? Or unable to see how good Ella looked last night?

The Barnacle: A loyal moron and a total fiance! This guy is more whipped than the type of cream many people put on top of sundaes. Ella didn't just wanna have sex with Jonah. She wanted to have middle-of-the-day-I'm-gonna-prove-I'm-hotter-than-your-fiancee-sex! The only type of sex that tops that would be a conjugal visit.

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Heather Locklear arrives on Melrose Place next week, and all we have to say is: Thank goodness!

The show has dragged for weeks now. No storyline stands out, largely due to the fact that Sydney's murder is no longer a mystery, due to the firing of Colin Egglesfield and Ashlee "I Suck!" Simpson.

On last night's installment - titled "Ocean" and recapped in detail on TV Fanatic - David made a move on Lauren and Jonah made amends with Riley.

Before doing so, however, he turned down the advances of Ella, which was dumb for two reasons:

1. Has he looked at Ella Simms?!?
2. This is why we watch Melrose Place: for tawdry sex and immoral actions. Jonah going home to Riley instead of to a hotel with Ella isn't sweet and romantic; it's boring and lame.

At least we got to see the old, manipulative Michael Mancini back in action. That's always a welcome sight.

So is any sort of character development, which we've sort of gotten with David. His crush on Lauren was actually believable; though, again, wouldn't it be more fun to watch her juggle a new boyfriend and a set of sex-crazed clients, as opposed to making the rational decision to rebuke David's advances?

We hope Amanda brings the drama next week. There's little doubt she will.

As always, there were a few choice Melrose Place quotes from the night at least:

Ella: Nothing about you is normal, and everything about Riley is normal. Painfully normal! | permalink

Violet: Either get me a lawyer, or I get you divorced. | permalink

Michael: There's a long list of students that would give their right arm for your spot. Don't blow it. | permalink

Ella: What would a boy do without his balls? | permalink

And Sydney's killer is...

Might we actually discover the identity of Sydney's killer this week on Melrose Place? It seems unlikely, but spoilers have revealed this mystery will be wrapped up before the new year.

In the clip below, courtesy of tomorrow's night episode, Jonah reveals what the police have found inside a certain neighbor's apartment. Who is it? And what did they confiscate?

Watch and find out:

Hey, did you hear that Heather Locklear is returning to Melrose Place in the role of Amanda Woodward?!?

While that casting news is well-known at this point, fans of the series should also be excited to know that it will focus heavily on Amanda over the next couple months.

The CW certainly isn't shy about advertising her return, which takes place on November 17. This is the latest teaser commercial it's been airing:

Of course, there is still one more hour of Melrose Place to go before Amanda returns. The episode "Ocean" airs next week.

According to the promo below, the Jonah/Riley relationship is truly on its last legs. Will Ella be there for the former when it finally topples? Follow the jump and see what we mean...

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Red hot sex between Auggie and Violet.

The likely end to Jonah and Riley.

The discovery of Sydney's murder weapon.

A whole lot went down on this week's episode of Melrose Place, all of which we reviewed earlier today.

Storylines aside for a moment, what about the songs played throughout the hour? As always, we've listed them all in our Melrose Place music section. Check out a sampling below, with easy links to iTunes for quick purchasing...

• A Fine Frenzy - "Electic Twist"
• Colin Barstow - "Wolves Final and Sexy"
• Dashboard Confessional - "Belle of the Boulevard"