Well, everyone calls me Andy, but my full name is Andrew...? I think...

Fleetwood Mac Sex Pants! Band name I call it! Or maybe just Fleetwood Mac.

Honestly, you'd look hot naked.

I'm allergic to sushi. Every time I eat more than 80 pieces, I throw up.

I can never tell if people are lying to me. I hope that doesn't come up in my police work.

Leslie: Seniors can be pretty ornery.
Andy: I think it's pronounced "horny."

Andy: Can we please make you into a princess?
Ron: No.
Andy: I think it would make Diane happy.
Ron: Why does that matter? Shut up.

Wow, sounds like you're going some tough stuff right now. Too bad there's not doctors for your mind.

I'll never be a cop! I'll have to be a robber...

Number one is being able to run 2 miles in under 25 minutes. That's a typo right? That's not humanly possible.

April, Here's something to remind you of our 3 -legged dog chapion. Also, you are way better at laundry. Can you please do mine and send it back to me? Thanks, Mouse Rat rules! Love, Andy. P.S. Please hurry. I've been wearing a bandana for underwear for 3 days now.

April [reading Andy's letter]

Can we by any chance stop at a place that has free pants?

Parks & Rec Quotes

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!


Leslie: Why would anybody ever eat anything besides breakfast food?
Ron: People are idiots, Leslie.