Favorite April Ludgate Quotes
To the better place world, Fred.
April: Do you have Internet in your office?
Chris: Yes.
Yes, I am 21 years old today, which is the age that pretty much everyone agrees makes you an adult.
Tom: Wow, how long has it been?
April: Three weeks.
April: Here's a great one. It's a Tudor mansion. It's got seven rooms, four bathrooms. It's got a tennis court, a pool and a three-car garage.
Andy: What?
April: And it's only $20,000 a month. And it's in Chicago.
Andy: Ahh, that close. It was almost perfect.
I had to finish watching Swimfan because it was... on.
Ann: Once again, they are my biological children.
April: And once again, I don't believe you.
April: Torturing Jerry was my favorite thing in the world. Next to making out with you.
Andy: Remember when we did that at the same time? It made him so uncomfortable!
I'm April Ludgate Kvorkian.
I'm sorry, is your name Jennifer?
Tyynifer. No, it's Tyynifer with two ys. It used to be Jennifer, but then I decided to re-brand myself. Oh wait, it's Xanax-o'clock.
I passed up a gay Halloween party to be here. Do you know how much fun gay Halloween parties are? Last year I saw three Jonas brothers make out with three Robert Pattisons. It was amazing.
Tyynifer: You're so awesome right now. You're like a skinny Mother Theresa.
April: It's Dwyane Wade's house. I got the address off the internet. I really hope he's there when she walks in and throws a basketball at her head.
