Popular Berta Quotes
This guy is like genital herpes. once you got him, you get him for life.
Walden: Is he prone to mental breakdowns?
Berta: Prone? No. Eligible? Certainly.
My point being, fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, I want a fully-funded 401K and a Camaro.
You know, once upon a time, a cute little boy came to live came to live in this house for a few days, maybe you've met him, and he is the pot-soaked, masturbating, couch-eating potato who eats all your cookies.
I try not to insult people who can come back and haunt me.
Alan: Wow, seems like just yesterday, he was an adorable, chubby-cheeked little boy catching a Frisbee on the beach in Santa Monica.
Berta: Now, he is a fuzz-face, buck private catching the clap from a whore in Tijuana.
Berta: Seems like this house haunted; by an old spirit that does not just want to move.
Alan: Hey , you are not blaming this on me, okay?
Berta: You can just keep staring at your laptop all day.
Walden: I made a billion dollars doing this.
Berta: Well, carry on.
That, my friends, is what happens when hillbillies have unprotected sex with hummingbirds.
Alan: She just wants to take advantage of Walden.
Berta: You do hear yourself talk, right?
Alan: Yes, I am a mooch, but I am not dangerous.
Walden: I love you Berta.
Berta: You are one sentimental little taco.
Berta: There are better things I am more interested in than my birthday...
Alan: You would not believe what happened to me today!!!
Berta: I stand corrected.