How is it even when you're dead you're the bane of my existence?

Turn it up a little bit. It's not annoying yet.

I get you out of here and your ass is sipping Klaus-free margaritas in some unknown island somewhere, no way.

Damon: So let me guess--in addition to the moonstone, the doppelganger, the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe, you need to find this witch burial ground.
Elijah: Because I feel that we've grown so close, Damon, I'll tell you "yes."

Mason Lockwood? Werewolf thing aside, the guy's a surfer.

You just don't wanna die, do you?

Zach: You don't visit, Damon... You appear. Periodically. Reminding me that this isn't my house, that you're only allowing me to live here ... allowing me to live.
Damon: Someone had to mow the lawn.

Damon: I always pegged you for a lone wolf.
Mason: I'm sure I wasn't half the lady killer you were.

Andie: What do you want, Mr. Tall, Dark and Handsome?
Damon: I'm not that tall.

Damon: I killed you. You were dead.
Elijah: For centuries now.

Katherine: You hurt me today.
Damon: Tit for tat.

Stefan: I'm sorry about Rose.
Damon: Whatever, I knew the woman for...five minutes.
Stefan: Well, you cared about her after five minutes though. I wonder what that means?
Damon: It means I care, Stefan. It means I'm changing and evolving into a man capable of greatness.

Vampire Diaries Quotes

Oooh, you know I don't know. Every time we try and go on a date you get kidnapped, I get sent to a prison world, or your feelings get compelled away...

Damon

Damon: My new girlfriend. Andie Starr. Action News.
Alaric: It's not called Action News.
Damon: I know. I like just saying it.