The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXFavorite Groundskeeper Willie Quotes
Ahhh Wolfie, don't feel bad for losin'. I been wreslin' wolves since you were at your mother's teat.
Bart: Willie, I know you witnessed the most awesome prank since creation.
Willie: I'll nay speak to you of those dark times, Bart Simpson.
Bart: But if there was a more awesome dude than I, I need to know who he was, what he did and how many days detention he got.
Willie: What's that?
Principal Skinner: We didn't want to leave you out of the digital revolution. Willie, meet your new supervisor.
Willie: I have to take orders from a machine?
Principal Skinner: Oh it can't speak, but should it ever learn, yes.
(While hearing Lisa's bad saxophone playing) Sounds like the gopher I caught in me lawnmower.
Willie: I'll have to use explosives.
Bart: Explosives? Great! [takes out map] If we put charges on the load bearing walls, we can blow up detention hall, leaving art class okay.
Willie: Hmm?
Bart: What! I like art, okay?
Willie: I'm blowing up the stump, not the school.
Bart: Right right, you never saw that.
You strays are going straight to the pound where you'll be put to sleep... by my boring stories. And then you'll be killed!
</i> Dogcatcher Willie
Groundskeeper Willie: I'll bring those kids back dead or alive!
Skinner: Not DEAD!
Groundskeeper Willie: Aw, you never let Willie be Willie!
Lisa: Willie, I love your chaps.
Willie: Me pants are ripped out.
Willie: You want me to carve it into a thank-o-lantern?
Lisa: No, this is good.
Willie: Well, this knave's got to carve something.
Groundskeeper Willie: Come on ya pansies, I've seen fiercer fights in parliament
Sideshow Mel: What is this, prime minister's question time?