Favorite Hermes Quotes
Leela: What's the mission?
Farnsworth: It's a delivery for the Democratic Order Of Planets.
Fry: DOOP? What's that?
Farnsworth: It's similar to the United Nations from your time, Fry.
Fry: Uh...
Hermes: Or like the Federation from your Star Trek programme.
Fry: Oh!
Farnsworth: Uh... Jenny McNeal, you are charged with jury-tampering in last week's case... on account of your hot, naked affair with the foreman. How do you plead?
Leela: Your Honour, I move for a mistrial, on the grounds that I'm also having a hot, naked affair with the foreman of this jury.
Hermes: I'll see you during the recess!
Lrrr: If McNeal wishes to be taken seriously why does she not simply tear the judge's head off?
Hermes: Bender, man. It has come to my attention that this company has been paying you to do nothing but loaf about on the couch.
Bender: You call that a couch? I demand a pillow!
Farnsworth: I'd like everyone to meet our new employees. Which ones are new?
Hermes: The green dude and the fat man.
Farnsworth: Hmm, I could swear I've never seen that robot before either.
Bender: I'm Bender. You know? The lovable rascal.
Farnsworth: Oh, yes, yes. My good friend, of course. Anyway, whoever you all are, I have good news. You'll be making a delivery to Stumbos 4, a planet with such high gravity you'll most likely be crushed under the weight of your own hair. Enjoy!
Amy: Hey, look at Nibbler!
Hermes: Aww, he's holding a spoon.
Zoidberg: He's so talented!
We find the defendant vulnerable yet spunky!
Farnsworth: Now I'll simply tune it to Leela's emotional frequency.
Bender: My God! I'm overcome with... feelings. I'm experiencing a powerful yearning to... to cram my gullet full of mackerel heads.
Zoidberg: That's me, baby!
Farnsworth: Hmm.
Bender: Now I'm worried that I'm not as smart as Leela, but at the same time I feel relieved that I'm cuter than her.
Amy: Uh... that's me.
Fry: Thanks for covering.
Bender: This time I miss Nibbler and I'm feeling nosy and opinionated.
Amy: Bingo!
Hermes: That's Leela!
Morgan: I'm afraid he's lost in the master in pile, and it would take some sort of giant, mechanical, atomic-powered sorting machine to find him.
Hermes: You rang?
Farnsworth: Damnit, Hermes, just jump already. Stop hogging that healthy liver.
Professor: We've been hired to make our 100th building delivery!
Hermes: That's nearly ten per year.
Bender: At least I'll always have her bracelet! What do you think it's worth?
Hermes: It's fake, mon.
(Bender cries.)
As this shocking graph indicates, our water consumption has tripled in the last month. I notice Fry has been here for a month, so I'm appointing him head of a committee to find who's responsible.
Hermes: No, I want to live. Organising that forced-labour spa rekindled my lifelong love of bureaucracy.
LaBarbara: My Hermes got that hellhole running so efficiently that all the physical labour is now done by a single Australian man.
