Cougar Town
Tuesdays 10:00 PM on TBSFavorite Jules Cobb Quotes
Dead mom high five!
I don't believe in ghosts, because if they were real I'd like to think that I would be felt up all the time.
Travis, we'll never be even. Want to see the scar from the Cesarean section? There's a hair growing in it now.
Grayson: You can't stand to be along for a second can you?
Jules: That is ridiculous
Grayson: So why did you go out with father time?
Jules: Because I am a history buff and I haven't been in a car with only a lap belt in a long time
Jules: Oh my god, that bag is soaked with grease. I'm telling you right now, i don't care what's in it, I'm eating it.
Travis: It's a human head.
Jules: If it's deep fried, I'm still in.
Jules: When you act like you don't want to talk to me, it just makes me want to talk to you even more.
Grayson: That may be the world's most annoying personality trait.
I'm happy about Bobby's new horn, the odds from my son dying in a golf cart accident went from definitely to probably
Travis: Good bye, I love you dad
Jules: Oh my god, did he just say I love you?
Bobby: I know, pretty gay right?
Jules: If you're not going to talk to me, why'd you come back to my house?
Ellie: Cause I'm wet and I know you just recovered your couch.
Ellie: You totally had sex last night
Jules: How'd you know
Ellie: I'm your best friend, I know these things, plus there's a condom wrapper on your back
Jules: Oh, is it just the one?
Ellie: Good god, Jules
Jules: Would you help us figure out who gets dibs on a guy.
Laurie: Well that's easy, which one of you is pregnant?
Jules: No one.
Laurie: Then I got nothing.
Laurie: There's nothing in your purse except three hundred dollars
Jules: That's five hundred, that's my half of a stupid bet bobby bet
Laurie: No, this feels like three hundred. My brother sold pot for six years
