Cougar Town
Tuesdays 10:00 PM on TBSFavorite Laurie Keller Quotes
I am pissed that they just played a Miley Cyrus song and everyone knew the lyrics!
Laurie: Jules I didn't know you sponsored an African child.
Jules: Oh yeah, little Omari. He's 10. I gotta say those letters are getting a little repetitive. It's hot; I'm hungry; there's snakes.
Wrong Balls is trending on Twitter. It's above Bieber.
I have a rule that every kiss should last three seconds - it's what the Obama's do.
What we did was totally natural like the wind... or not trusting Canadians.
Laurie: Burn in hell you sad, desperate skank.
Grayson: Texting your mom?
Laurie: Yeah.
Laurie: I'm still young enough that I can totally change who I am.
Ellie: We can only hope.
Don't look a gift whore in the mouth.
Laurie: I wish you could make it simpler.
Grayson: Donkey likes hybrids, health care and homosexuals and elephant likes God.
Laurie: I saw an elephant pray in the circus once.
Grayson: Wow, that's relevant.
Laurie: So both of our votes count the same, right?
Grayson: Yeah, it's a great system.
Laurie: I think it works.
I am now the official baker of the Latin Kings. Lil' Choke is gonna be so excited he gets stomped in this week.
Jules: It it so much harder to be a single woman.
Laurie: So much harder, do you read Kathy?
Jules: Grayson is totally pursey whipped. That is really gonna catch on. pursey magnet, pursey hound.
Laurie: Pursey cat.
Ellie: That's not how it works.
