Milhouse: I checked around... the girls are calling you Fatty Fat Fat Fat and Nelson's planning to pull down your pants. But, nobody's trying to kill ya.
Bart: Aaah... that's good.
Nelson: pulls down pants
Group Of Girls: Fatty fat fat fat, fatty fatty fat fat!

Bart: Oh boy! Free trading cards!
Milhouse: Wow! Joseph of Arimathea! 26 conversions in A.D. 46.
Nelson: Whoa, a Methuselah rookie card!
Flanders: (chuckles) Well boys, who'd have thought learning about religion could be fun?
Bart: Religion?
Milhouse: Learning?
Nelson: Let's get out of here!

Bart: Weird, I just made an entire lose its lunch.
Nelson: And?
Bart: I'm not feeling the rush.
Nelson: Tell me more.
Bart: Something's missing. Am I broken?
Nelson: Jump with me. Bart, at the end of the day, if your parents aren't p.o.'d you haven't really pranked. You have to take it up a notch.
Bart: Really?
Nelson: If no one's getting mad, are you really being bad? Think about it.

Mrs. Krabappel: Bart Simpson, you've had three months to do this project, you started 30 seconds ago.
Bart: Thank you, thank you.
Mrs. Krabappel: I'm not complimenting you. You've destroyed every ideal i've had about teaching since I saw To Sir With Love as a little girl.
Nelson: Haha, you're old.
Mrs. Krabappel: I saw it on video in the eighties.
Nelson: Outdated media, I stand by my "haha."

Nelson: Imagine...a school out there with no bullies.
Jimbo: Science geeks not getting beat up. Kids using their lunch money for food.
Nelson: I can't take it!

Nelson: I want you to keep filling your shirt with crud until I get back.
Milhouse: Yes, sir.

Milhouse: I've seen the Itchy and Scratchy Movie 13 times.
Nelson: I've seen it 17 times!
Bart: You must be getting pretty tired of that movie by now, huh?
Milhouse: No one who saw the movie'd say that!
Nelson: Let's get him!

Milhouse: Let me try! Will I get beat up today? ... All signs point to yes
Nelson: That ball knows everything. *punch*

Nelson: Hey Simpson, what are you trying to play?
Bart: Polly-Wally-Doodle.
Nelson: Oh yeah, well it sounds Polly-Wally-Crappy.

Edna: After two months at sea, the pilgrims were running out of food and water. Yes, Nelson?
Nelson: Did they have any yo-yo's?
Edna: No, they did not have yo-yo's. When they landed at Plymouth Rock, they were greeted by the friendly Indians.
Milhouse: Did the Indians have yo-yo's!?
Edna: No they did not have yo-yo's! That's it! I am sick and tired of talking about yo-yo's. From now on I won't accept any book report, science project, dioramas, or anything else on yo-yo's, or yo-yo related topics. Am I making myself clear?
Bart: Yo!

Nelson: Hey, Simpson, where's your loser-mobile!
Homer: Loser mobilehehehewait a minute!
Bart: Uh, It's over there Nelson.
Nelson: Whoa, talk about your pieces of crap!

Goon #2: Nelson, you're bleeding.
Nelson: Nah, happens all the time. Somebody else's blood splatters on me. (Sniffs) Hey, wait a minute. You're right. (to Bart) You made me bleed my own blood!

The Simpsons Quotes

Larry: What you got riding on this?
Homer: My daughter.
Larry: What a gambler!

Maggie? Oh, you must be sick. Let's see, what's old Dr. Washburn prescibe? Do you have dropsy? The grippe? Scofula? The vapors? Jungle rot? Dandy fever? Poor man's gout? Housemaid's knee? Climatic poopow? The staggers? Dum-dum fever?

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