Penny: I hear you broke up with Amy.
Sheldon: Breakup would imply she was my girlfriend. She was a girl who was my friend who is now not my friend.
Penny: Wow, It's like the worst country song ever.
Penny: God, he's an ass when he drinks.
Wolowitz: He's an ass he doesn't. You just don't hear it.
I just run till I'm hungry, and then I stop for a bear claw.
Leonard: Penny, Steve Wozniack was one of the co-founders of Apple computer. He and Steve Jobs...
Penny: Yeah. I know who he is. I watch Dancing With the Stars.
Penny: Honey, have you ever run before?
Sheldon: Certainly. I've run from bullies, dogs, angry chickens and one particularly persistent PE teacher determined to bend me over and give me a scoliosis test.
Penny: Can I ask you a question?
Sheldon: Given your community college education, I encourage you to ask as many as possible.
Penny: OK. Well, then, there's a couple of things you should probably know.
Sheldon: I have a master's degree and two doctorates. The things I should know, I do know.
Penny: You have nice hair.
Amy: Are you a homosexual?
Amy: Would have been more flattered if you were a homosexual.
Sheldon: As a native Texan, I must say that I've never heard the phrase "yee haw" used in quite that context.
Penny: Oh God.
Sheldon: "Oh God." That I've heard on multiple occasions.
Sheldon: This is for you
Penny: Ice cream?
Sheldon: I've been familiarizing myself with female emotional crises by studying the comic strip, "Cathy." when she's upset she says, "ack" and eats ice cream.
Sheldon: If you were a cat, I would have brought you lasagna.
Leonard: If my PE teachers told me this is what I was training for I would have tried a lot harder.
Penny: Do or do not, there is no try.
Leonard: Did you just quote Star Wars?
Penny: I believe I quoted Empire Strikes Back.
Leonard: Oh my God. I'm lying in bed with a beautiful woman who can quote Yoda.
Penny: So what do you say, Sheldon, are we your X-Men?
Sheldon: No, the X-Men were named for the "X" in "Charles Xavier." Since I am Sheldon Cooper, you will be my "C-Men."